The Zipper Factor

OK, I did it... I don't know why I did it, but I did it. I ventured into my closet and tried on a couple of pre-pregnancy pants. Now, anyone who is anyone knows that this is completely taboo and will set your self-esteem rating so far back that you may be in danger of spending the day in bed with the curtains drawn watching reruns of The Andy Griffith Show. Thankfully I found a cute summer skirt that fits and only shows partial pantie lines... no pad lines though-that is a bonus!

The zipper status on my pants is at no-status. I cannot zip them, not even the baggie ones yet. I knew it was too soon. What was I thinking? I know what I was thinking-I weighed myself and felt pretty good. I surveyed my body nekid before my shower and felt pretty confident that I no longer looked pregnant... heck, I look a lot like most high school girls do nowadays. I should just throw on a belly button shirt and some hipster jeans and call it good. I would be sooo in fashion.

So I have entered this stage of postpartum... that delicate dance with pre-pregnancy clothing and zippers. I didn't take into consideration hip widening, or butt sagging... but hopefully next week I can get the zipper at least half the way up. That will be just a step closer to getting that zipper all the way up even though it is being pulled to the seams and saying to myself "Good job! Now lets wear these babies out in public!"

On Sunday I attempted a few pre-pregnancy tops. My boobs literally laughed in my face in the mirror and taunted me. Silly silly girl... medium shirts are for milk free tata's.

I wonder how Pamela Anderson does it!