5.20.2007

What Kind of Wife Are You?

My husband asked if he could go golfing today after Mass. I had to laugh-what really was I going to say? He put me in a tough situation. If I said "no!" I would be the big mean wife who doesn't let him do anything, and if I said "I don't care" I would be the wife who doesn't want him to go but will not say that and will punish him later with the silent treatment and angry looks the rest of the night, and if I said "Oh, YES! That sounds like a great day for you!" I would be a wife who lies!

I decided to let him decide what he should do-which probably puts me in the worst wife category... how could I possibly throw all of the guilt on to him directly? If I give him a yes or no answer he is off the hook with the ultimate decision right? I figured I would let him decide his own actions since I have enough to deal with in terms of children, laundry, and dinner.

So he decided to take his fate in his own hands and go golfing, but not before he pointed out to me that he is going to a course that he does not like very much and he is only playing 9 holes. Poor guy-he really needed an afternoon off, what with just having a baby and all.

Now, listen to my plans~I just put the baby down for a nap. That means I have 23 minutes to get to the grocery across the street. In this free time of mine, I have to round up my three other children from the outdoors because they cannot be outside when I am across the street at the grocery... so I get to deal with yelling, screaming, cursing, and tantrums (all on my part). I will take the 3 year old with me on my free 23 minutes because if I leave her at home with her older siblings, there will be blood involved when I come home and a bunch of "I didn't do it!" lines for me to sift through, and I won't be able to find the dog.

So I am off now, to run through the aisles as if my hair is on fire in order to get home in time to start dinner just as the baby is waking up so that I can finish making dinner one-handed while I hold the baby in the other arm-the arm that will bulk up with muscle twice the size of my right arm within the year from performing this one-handed dinner task. If I am really lucky, I will get a one-armed load of laundry in and I will do a one-arm vacuum job on the family room. This will all be done in time for my golfing husband to come home from his relaxing afternoon and sit down to dinner with the family. He will wonder why the kids all have duct tape on their mouths and why the dog is partially shaved... but he will not say a thing because he knows as well as I do that all the things that went wrong today happened for one reason and for one reason only. He went golfing. But I left the decision up to him~

6 comments:

Alexa said...

Why am I always the first to comment???
I promise you, I am NOT stalking you.

Tell your husband "it's in the Catechism" that "you didn't make the rules" - Sunday is a day spent with Family.

And that goes for you too - hot dogs in the microwave, a book in one hand and a nursing baby in the other while your husband plays checkers with the older two and the three year old plays with their Duplo blocks at the floor beside you.

If they want more than hot dogs- I don't know...offer them the other breast.

Toni said...

You are better than me. I would have said,'Sure, which 2 kids are you taking?'

Shae said...

To the one arm thing... Don't you have a sling and/or a snugli?

I'd have said. You may go, but I'll be very unhappy about it.

Dana said...

I'm so glad you decided to use the duct tape!

Mary Poppins NOT said...

I used to do the same thing you did, and be pissed off about it. Now, I just lay it all down. "I would rather you didn't go. I need your help and want to have a nice Sunday together as a family."

Sometimes he still chooses to go, but at least I feel authentic. Mean what you say, and say what you mean. It took me WAY to long to embrace that one!

Shauna said...

Hope you got YOU time later on! You deserve it!