1.24.2009

Don't Look At Me That Way... I'm Allowed To Complain

There has been something that I always complain about and I am a bit leery to put it on this blog for the simple fact that it looks as though I have a lot of newly married brides who are frequenting the Six-Pack as of late... but I just can't stay silent any longer. I have to let it out--but I want all of you new brides out there to know that in no way, shape or form do I think marriage is a bad thing. I love being married-I do. I wouldn't change it for the world.

Also, I do not want to be looked at as a "complaining blogger" when I type this because many of you may read this and say "sheesh... what in the world is she complaining about!" But this has been one heck of a week for me and my mood is a bit of a funk and therefore I need to vent-and I can't vent about everything (really June? You can't vent about your double agent persona in the government?)

AND... I don't want any of you to think that my husband does not help out--because he does (no, not really, but we'll say he does because he likes to think he does and we all know that if a man thinks he is doing something and then a woman corrects him, he has a hard time with this criticism... but whatever.)

So now that I have said that... let's get on with it shall we?

Men are freakin' lucky!!!!!

Let me break it down for you:

When a guy is single, he has to do his own laundry (unless his mother still does it) he has to fix his own dinner (which I am thinking consists of soup, sandwiches and take-out) he has to clean his own bathroom (c'mon ladies... we have all seen what our husband's bathrooms looked like when we dated them-unless they lived with their mother) and so on...

When a girl is single she has to do her own laundry, fix her own dinner and clean her own bathroom and so on...

When a man and a woman get married, the man no longer has to do his laundry-the woman does hers and his. The man no longer has to cook-the woman does this too, and you can bet that she is no longer eating cereal for dinner like she did when she was single, she is making things like pot roast and mashed potatoes and all kinds of other fattening things to please her new husband. The woman also takes on the entire bathroom cleaning duties as well, leaving the man to never have to scrub a toilet-the toilet that he makes so much dirtier than she ever would-again.

Eventually children are added to this marriage and the man's life is still not really affected by this. He has a wife that will take care of the kids from getting them to school, to the doctor, to piano lessons, to basketball, and the wife will also clean the children, feed the children, and make sure the children look presentable.

Basically, men have it made when they get married. No questions.

The other day I was listening to a conversation between a few men. One of these men was about to get married and the other men in this group were giving him a hard time. They were telling this guy about women complaining and nagging and even referring to their wives as a "ball and chain."

I was appalled. What would these guys be doing if they weren't married? And don't you dare say "having a good time" you male readers out there. You would be lost without your wife taking care of your life for you.

That is what wives do-they take care of you. They feed you, clothe you, and just like the children, she makes sure you look presentable (she would never let you walk out of the house with a black belt and brown shoes now would she?)

Your wife loves you... and what do you do for her? And don't say "I make the money!" Big deal-I could make money too-in fact, I DO make money so that argument does not hold water.

What else do you do? Hmmm? I mean honestly guys... what do you do for your wife to make sure she is taken care of? When is the last time you put on rubber gloves and cleaned a toilet after she had a stomach virus? When is the last time you checked the pockets of her pants before you washed them to make sure her wallet would not go through the wash? When was the last time you made her a meal that you didn't like but made it anyway because it is her favorite? When was the last time you made sure the sheets were changed on the bed every week or made sure she had a fresh towel after her shower? When was the last time you checked the calendar and reminded her about her dentist appointment, and if she couldn't make it, when was the last time you called to cancel one of her appointments with a feasible excuse? And when was the last time you sat through a television show that you do not like just so you could be close to her on the couch?

I am telling you... you men have it made when you get married.

And the whole "ball and chain" complaining nagging thing? Well, lets just say that you would get a little testy too if you had to not only do for yourself but also do for everyone else in the house on a daily basis.

She just wants a little help. She just wants you to pick up your socks from the bathroom floor and get them in the hamper. She just wants you to put your milk glass in the dishwasher and not in the sink. She just wants you to put the remote control back in the little basket next to the couch and not stuffed between the cushions. She just wants you to wipe your shaven hairs down the drain in the bathroom sink. She just wants you to be grateful.

Women have dreams when they are young just like men do, but our dreams always seem to be put on hold for the common good of the family. We put them on hold to take care of our husbands and our children all the while making sure everyone else strives for and achieves their dreams. Some days it is hard to realize that we can't fulfill our dreams because we are doing laundry and making dinner.

Don't get me wrong, I love the things that have sidetracked my dreams, and I am sure that I will one day fulfill my dreams... and I am thrilled and proud of my husband's dreams and the part I have played in helping him fulfill them, but it would be nice if he didn't assume that it was my JOB to scrub the damn toilet.

I am not the only one that craps in it.

How did I get this duty?



.

28 comments:

Sagey said...

Thank you for reminding me I am not alone! I agree with it all (except Blunoz will put clean sheets on the bed after I take the dirty ones off).

I hope you are adjusting to Carl's departure again. I know it is hard!

Alicia said...

AMEN, SISTA!!!!!!!!

Diva Mom Vicki said...

CAN I GET ANOTHER AMEN!

You tell it, Sister!

Soliloquy said...

June, I must say that you are rockin this blog as of late. I have howled at your recent posts. Howled.

I'm sorry my entertainment has come at your expense but thank you!

june cleaver said...

Hey Soliloquy-I have tried to comment on your blog (especially when you were wondering how to get money out of your hubby... I have a great idea for that one.) but it won't accept me. Ever since I had my virus protections updated I can't get on non-blogspot blogs.

Please check your spam-I have too much to say to be silenced! I feel like I am in a communist country. PLEASE!

:)

Alicia Seevers said...

AMEN! AMEN! AMEN! AMEN!

(Keri) Auburn Gal Always said...

I want to know how you read my mind all the way down here in Alabama?

I was thinking these very same things this morning and afternoon (and all day yesterday) as I cleaned, cooked, wrapped gifts and decorated for BOTH our kids' birthday parties. (Sissy's 8 y-o party was last night. Lucky's 2 y-o party was today.) What was The Mighty Hunter doing while I played the happy homemaker (with a migriane, btw)? Checking emails, napping, watching Burn Notice.

He'll make up for it. I promise! A week from tomorrow is my birthday dinner at Cheesecake Factory. Also, I'm redecorating while he is out of town.

Musings of the Mrs. said...

Thats funny. Thats not my life at all. I totally love your blog but talk about opposites attracting. Love it!

TRO said...

Nope, I'm not touching this one with a ten foot pole.

Tempting though it was . . .

Anonymous said...

I will AMEN this post...a great example, when I was getting divorced from my first husband, he had the nerve to call me and ask me to come show him how to load and run the dishwasher. We had been married for 13 years...then he had the nerve to tell me that taking care of a house and our kids when they were there was hard work...well duh..such a smart man. No wonder I divorced him!!!

Rebecca said...

And when they do clean a dish or do something beyond take out the trash they want some huge applause & parade in their honor. LOL Gotta love 'em though.

Stiletto Reflections said...

I think a lot of woman assume that role. I did not. This is a huge issue with me & I knew it before getting married. My husband is about as 'manly' as you can get. But I work FT too and there's no freaking way I'm going to work a FT job AND assume all the responsibilities at home too. He does laundry, cooks, helps with the bills. He's a clean freak so he has no problem driving the vacuum, lol. It's something I pretty much demanded in the beginning. I'm an EOE, lol. I do love your blog too, you crack me up & are a great writer.

Jessi said...

I'm glad that I'm not the only one that feels that way! Every once in a while I get the feeling I totally got the raw end of the deal. Like blood from the skin raw but the other half can't understand why I feel that way, to him marriage is pretty easy. Saying that after he puts on a pair of pants that I hunted down, I washed, I folded and I put away. Nobody does that for me...ugh. LOL!

Jonni said...

OH MY, amenamenamenamenamenamenamen. Did I say AMEN?? Thanks for making me laugh about it all......

Blessed Mama said...

Another Amen here! It isn't that we don't love them to pieces, but sheesh!

Trophy Wife said...

AMEN, "June"!!!! Thus, I have proudly taken on the pseudonym of Trophy Wife and the really neat part is that my husband introduces me that way :) When asked why, he tells them that it would take a Trophy Wife to put up with all his crap!

I love that man (most of the time, anyway...wink wink)

Andrea said...

You go girl!

Kelly said...

LMAO! So True!!!

Lady Lauren said...

Do none of you ladies have children? Sheesh, I don't think my mom has scrubbed a toilet since the oldest of us turned 10 . . . I think that was a requirement of homeschooling, actually.

Anonymous said...

Nail on the head.
Tina

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Anonymous said...

I picked out the DVD.
I switched the TV to A1 so we could watch the DVD.
Figured out how to fix the DVD when it goofed up.
And when it was time to get it returned before midnight and asked him if he wanted to take it back, he said no. So I took it back and when he smiled and said, gee that didn't take long, I was speechless.
It didn't take long because I was so pissed off that I broke the speed limit getting to the video store and back so I wouldn't miss The Hallmark Hall of Fame movie last night. "Saving Leah" Hope you saw it it was a good one!
But I still love him! I spoiled him...all my myself!!! ;)

stephanie said...

vent away....anytime!! and i really cannot fathom how some gals say they have husbands who do some of that stuff on a regular basis. geez. i have three boys i'd love to train to be those kinds of husbands, but so far it's not lookin' good since i pick up eight shoes off the living room floor every night before bed, and if i don't then the next night it is sixteen and so on. gotta go scrub the toilet now...

Millionaire Maker said...

i,
Fantastic post, wonderful breakdowns . Simply put ………. Very useful . Thanks heaps for sharing your experiences and knowledg

Stupid Fat Hobbit said...

Oh, somebody call the Wambulance!!!

You are so lucky I didn't read this when you posted it. You sneakily posted something else 6 hours later and so I didn't get it right away.

Let me tell you, if men go away, who's going to parallel park your van for you? Huh, who? And just who do you think is going to open that jar you can't get open? What's that? Silence? Oh, oh, and who's going to kill the big, scary spider on the bathroom wall? Yeah, that's what I thought, nobody? You'd be a non-parked, closed-jarred, overrun by spiders basket-case, that's what you'd be!

You try being married to a woman for a month and tell me who you'd rather be. At least you know who's coming home every day after work! Do we? Noooooooooo! We have to search through all the crap to figure out whether it's nice-wife, cranky-wife (not much searching here though), sexy-wife (don't get me started), bloated-wife, hungry-wife, dinner and a movie-wife, where's the chocolate-wife...are you getting me here? A man comes home and there's just one man in him, that's all, one! You might not be in love with him today but that's not because he changed, it's because you haven't figured out which wife you are yet!!!

WOW, I feel better. Thanks for this post, I really needed it.

MKHKKH said...

So true it hurts. And I don't explode all over the toilet like he does, yet, it is still my glorious job.

P.S.Love your picture. You look great! Guess you lost those 10lbs before Carl got home :)

june cleaver said...

Hobbit... that was the funniest thing I have read in a long long time. Thank you--it is all a big fat lie, but thanks for the laughs my friend.

june cleaver said...
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