Thanks, But No Thanks... Really.

Something happened last night that has never happened in my 17 years of being with my husband...

Someone hit on my husband when I was sitting smack dab next to him!

I am not blind or stupid, I am aware of the fact that my husband is freakin' hot, but I did not know how to react to the type of attention he was getting.

I have to tell you that I have had other women flirt and chat with my husband whilst I am around. They get no where with him and they usually end up with my foot up their ass...

But this time it was different. This time it was our WAITER!

We sit down at a table at one of our favorite eating establishments and are greeted by the waiter. "Hi, my name is Dave, I'll be your server tonight." I looked up and realized that we have had Dave wait on us before, so I mention this. "Oh, hello. We have had you for our waiter before." To which he replies, "I know... I recognize him." And he looked at my husband with a sort of Ooohh La La feel about it. He then proceeded to sit down across from us (because we were sitting next to each other, not because we were being romantic, but because we were at a Sport's Bar and the Oklahoma game was only on the TV in front of us. It we had sat across from each other one of us would not be able to see the game.) Anyway, Dave sits down across from us, well, more across from my husband than from me, and he puts his elbows on the table and rests his chin in his two hands gazing at my husband.

My eyes must have been as big as saucers and my husband suddenly became very uncomfortable.

He offered to tell us the specials, but I was afraid of the specials so I cut him off and sent him on his way.

I think my husband did the best he could to make it clear that he was not interested. He guzzled beer, cursed, burped 7 times, farted 3 times and yelled "HERE'S TO HONOR!" and smacked me on the rear and called me "woman" as we were leaving.

After that display of manliness I can see why poor Dave was so turned on by him. He is pretty irresistible.


Beth said...

What a hoot! I guess you know your hubs is hot if the men are hitting on him too. I think you should be proud.

Matilda said...

That same thing happened to my in-laws on one of their wedding anniversaries. I refuse to eat at a certain restaurant because of the cheeky chippy who tried to flirt with my husband an ignored me!

the Mom said...

Are you an Oklahoma fan? God bless Bob Stoops, that nice Catholic boy.

As for your husband's display of masculinity..it is pretty difficult to ignore the mating call of the North American homo-sapien male.

Kasia said...

Oh, my. I did once have my hairdresser (yes, male, and yes, gay) tell me how cute my boyfriend was, and that he looked like "a cuter Moby", but nothing like THAT.

Your husband must be smokin'! :-)

Jen M. said...

I have to admit, as much as that would bug me, it would be SO MUCH worse if it were a woman!

Shauna Loves Chocolate said...

That is just too funny! Mostly because it's happened to me.. That is, my husband gets hit on all the time (by men and women) right in front of me. Drives me mad!