Just What Are They Teaching You At This Preschool Of Yours?

Some days I truly wonder what kind of values I am teaching my children.

Last Friday I talked Emma into skipping school. She really wanted to go, but I was that bad friend that talked her into ditching and going to the movies. The movies are so much more fun than preschool anyway.

I remember when I was a kid and in high school, my friend Jackie and I decided to ditch school after lunch. We had English after lunch with Mr. Lemon. We hated English with Mr. Lemon, so we decided to make a run for it! We stopped at the local deli for a couple of sandwiches and as we were enjoying our first meal of freedom who do you think decides to get a sandwich at the same exact deli at the same exact time as us? MR LEMON! Oh the injustice of it all! Needless to say, we were back in school and in English class that day. Our plans to become juvenile delinquents was thwarted! I continued on the road to rightdom and Jackie took a U-turn and headed straight for the life of a school ditcher and boyfriend stealer. She ended up stealing my boyfriend because she would what I wouldn't and who knows where she is today. Probably in Hollywood.

Anyway, this was a big deal for Emma to not go to school. She loves school, but I thought it would be more fun to have a family day. When you are a homeschool family and you work hard all week to get a little reward on Friday, there is nothing worse than having to bend to the "man" and having to keep the rigid schedule of preschool. Sheesh.

On Monday Emma was all in a worry as to what to tell her teacher about her not being at school on Friday. I was all "Don't sweat it chick, preschool is so not worth this cramp in our style." and she was all "I AM GOING TO JAIL!"

Finally I convinced her to tell her teacher the truth... that we were at the local nursing home visiting sick elderly people for charity.

I don't know what it is about this kid but she refuses to lie.

In the car on the way to school Emma was nervously planning out exactly what she was going to say. She was going to tell her teacher that her mother, the same one that smashed her finger to bits the other day, insisted that she skip school and go to the movies. She was going to throw in that she didn't really enjoy the movie that much so it was so not worth missing painting and singing at school. She wanted her teacher to know that she would never again listen to her mother when she tried to get her to do bad things and that she would promise to lead a life that was exemplary to say the least.

I was in the drivers seat gagging.

As we pulled up to school we realized that it was a holiday-Veteran's Day-and there was NO SCHOOL!!!

Emma was so relieved that she didn't have to explain her delinquency to her teacher and I just looked in the rear view mirror and said, "Don't thank me sister, thank a Vet!"

God Bless America!


Kristina said...

ROFL! I chose not to go back to school on time one beautiful afternoon after school. When I finally got to school in the middle of English, my teacher just looked at me and said, "Back from the bathroom?"

I was that good of a kid! Wow! What an enlightening moment that was! No more being afraid of skipping school. No one would believed that I actually would, so I never got in trouble for it the few times that I did!

Stina said...

I don't have anything mind-blowing to say, just wanted to let you know this made me laugh out loud. Thanks!

jmdavis said...

what a great blog!! You make me laugh. I too am an IRISH Catholic stay-at-home Mom. What a joy to have learned of your site.

Momto5Minnies said...

We would not have been friends in High school. I am a worrier much like your Emma. The stress of having to find a reasonable excuse would be too much for me. I was a good girl.

NOW TODAY ... I think my husband finds my new ways sort of refreshing (bit of a rebel at times).

Kasia said...

Did it occur to her that she'd have to explain her truancy the next day??!

Nita said...

I am happy to have stumbled onto your blog, it is sooo funny. I also wondered if your darling daughter ever realized she'd need to explain her Friday absence the next day she had pre-school.

My husband and I were a bit like you, and our kids like your little Emma. They were often amazed at some of the things we not only approved, but actually encouraged.

Anonymous said...

I give your blog a 10, 10 , 10!
Aunt Barbara