List of Pet Peeves!
10. Finding a black curly hair on the soap when I step into the shower… and it ain’t mine.
9. Sticky counter tops and kitchen tables. I realize that people live in this house; I just don’t want it to look like monkeys do.
8. When someone eats off of my plate of food or drinks out of my glass. It grosses me out and I have to dump the food and drink and start anew.
7. When you are serving ice cream and as you scoop out the ice cream from the carton it gets all over you knuckles. I can’t stand this one-I won’t buy ice cream in the carton for this exact reason. We live off of ice cream bars because this pet peeve haunts me so much.
6. Senior citizens in the grocery store that you just can’t get away from. They are slow and they take up the middle of the aisle and it seems like they are in front of you for the entire shopping excursion.
5. Neighborhood kids who will ring my doorbell 750,000 times a day! I realize my children are fascinating and the only way you will have any fun on this block is if they come out to play, but for the love of Pete lay off of the friggen door bell! I fully admit this is a cranky pet peeve, but I love my kids… your kids, not so much. I seriously see myself becoming that one old lady on the block who yells things like “Get off of my lawn!” or “I’m going to call the police on your punk ass” but I have come to terms with this and just accepted my role on the block.
4. When people, usually of the male persuasion, ask me if I am breastfeeding as they glance at my boobs. I know they are fabulous-but you creep me out. Does it make your day brighter? Are you able to lead a fuller live now knowing whether or not my lovely lady humps are nursing my child? Are you really that concerned with the nutritional value of my child’s eating habits? No… you are just being a pervert and you may just get a drop kick to the groin from me so back off heebie-jeebie person.
3. When people come up to my baby and stick their face in hers and make all kinds of obnoxious sounds which cause her to cry and then they say “Oh, poor baby, is your mommy not feeding you?” Yeah… that is it. It has nothing to do with the fact that you are a stranger and you are sticking your strange face in hers and talking loud and breathing your stinky breath in her face. I am just not feeding her. Idiot.
2. When someone who shall remain nameless (it rhymes with wuther-in-raw) will try and take my baby out of my arms without asking permission first… as if she has some God-given right to take my child from me. Back off before you get a karate chop to the neck. Hi-YA!
And June’s #1 Pet Peeve:
When the man we all know and love on this blog will hide from his own mother by pretending he is busy doing things like picking up sticks out of the yard, getting the fire pit ready for those fall night fires that will happen in October, checking on the fish pond 12 times in an hour, or mowing all of the neighbors lawns. I do not think it is funny to leave me with her. Talk about throwing a person to the lions. Sure I may hide on the side of the house near the trash cans now and then drinking my beer in peace while she is here, but I can do that. I would chew my arm off if I had to… and just so we are clear, you owe me big time husband of mine. BIG TIME! Especially since you have been at the golf course now for the past 4 hours!!!