9.01.2008

Where For Art Thou Romeo?

This really does suck you know. Sure, sure, I am supposed to be the strong military wife that we all like to imagine. The one who can handle everything that comes her way while her better half is on the other side of the world. Sounds romantic doesn't it? The strong wife keeping things afloat at home while her soldier is fighting for those less fortunate? Well... it isn't.

Today was a bad day. The kids are making me go crazy. Seriously... crazy. The older two cannot say a kind word to one another if you paid them. If she says the sky is blue he says it is a aqua hue. If he says he brushed his teeth, she pretends to pass out from the smell of his breath. If she says that she needs another bottle of acne cream, he falls over laughing and pointing at her. I was tempted to put duct tape over their mouths earlier... I would have too if I could have found the duct tape, but all I could find was Hello Kitty band-aids. They weren't even waterproof.

The 5 year old has decided to be a dog for the past few days... a dog that has just had a litter of puppies and is lactating. That is right. She lays on her side and "attaches" little stuffed puppies to her tummy and says she is feeding them. She also pretends to go potty outside when I let the "real" dog in the house out. What are the neighbors thinking? At least she isn't barking at people. My friend's daughter used to bark at me when I would say hello to her. "Hi Susie, how are you today?" "Ruff Ruff" "Nice dog Susie."

The baby is teething, which means she has a runny nose and slobbers all over everything she is wearing. I can't really complain about her though because she is a baby and that trumps anything bad that can be going on. One look at her and I melt-thank God for babies.

It does not help that I feel so disconnected from my husband. 15-20 minute phone calls every other day are just not hacking it. I mean, I am a woman who likes to speak her 25,000 allotted words a day and now I have no one to listen to my theories on why I think Angelina Jolie eats only cottage cheese and laxatives and how the speed limit should be raised 10 mph if you have to go to the bathroom really bad. I cornered the mailman the other day and started telling him a story about unclogging my son's toilet until I realized he was slowly backing away from me and trying to slide into his little square mailman car.

We have tried to IM (that is "instant message" for all of you readers out there who only come on-line to read my blog and check the weather) but he will be knocked off -line every 30 seconds or so and after I have written a small novel about life out here I will realize that it is all one-sided and he hasn't gotten any of it.

So if I start writing blogs about the water bill or what I am going to cook for dinner, just understand it is because I am in need of an outlet other than BBC's "You Are What You Eat."

I miss my husband... not just because it is lonely at night, but because I don't have anyone to listen to me talk. Oh, and because he used to hang up all of the clothes that I throw on the floor of our closet and now I can't even see the floor and I have nothing to wear. It would be nice to have the bathroom trash emptied as well... and my bedside table lamp light bulb has burned out and now I have to turn the bright 100W overhead light on... and my van needs gas.

*Big Sigh*

31 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bless your heart! Doesn't it just stink? My son has returned to college, and when my husband is out of town everything goes wrong. His mere presence must keep the mice and bugs away. The moment there is no male human in the house is the very moment something that needs to be killed (for my safety and/or sanity) will appear. Or the toilet will somehow mess up. Sure, I can do it. I'd just rather a MAN do it for me. Preferably the man to whom I am married.

Unknown said...

I don't want to be that guy (once some jackass says that, it is already too late! He now is that guy! I digress...)

15-20 minute phone calls every other day are just not hacking it.

7.5-10 min of talk (on average per day) is something to be very thankful for.

During WW2, grandma went months without letters...

You and your family are in my prayers.

Michelle said...

(sympathetic clucking noises)

that's the best I got.

Anonymous said...

You have every reason to be going crazy and be frustrated. I feel for you. I was there too - first gulf war - pregnant with twins, on bed rest, and very little communication. It sucks - the whole time. Doesn't matter what people went through in the past, or what they will go through in the future. This is your experience and it hurts. So, go ahead and vent to us. You can even send me a long email about Angelina (she just can't be real), and I promise to answer!

Meg said...

I am so sorry for your last few days. Maybe this week will be better.

When it rains, it seems to pour.

a retired(05) army wife

meg in lower alabama

Anonymous said...

I am not a military wife, but I do sympathize with you! It is so hard when the husbands are away.

I love your blog, and you look lovely in your new picture.

Kathy said...

Feel free to rant and rave here--especially if the rants involve Matthew McConaughey :)

Anonymous said...

Hang in there! You can always talk to me about the water bill! :) Nice picture of you two!

Anonymous said...

Hey Sister,
Give me a call if you need to vent...I'm a good sound board. :)

Love you
Claire

Rebecca said...

((hugs)) I think that's the hardest part of them being gone, not having someone regularly there that you can talk to. At least the kids provide for some distraction during the day, the quiet of the night is the loneliest & what I hate the most. I hope you have a better day today.

Anonymous said...

Ice Cream and a good novel! We can talk about WW later!
And blog, blog, blog, vent, vent, vent. We are here for you!
Love,
Aunt Barbara

Anonymous said...

I can't imagine when J was still in the army and he left for three weeks it was aful.I will keep you all in my prayers and hey if you want to talk about water bills go for it.lol

Anonymous said...

I can't imagine when J was still in the army and he left for three weeks it was aful.I will keep you all in my prayers and hey if you want to talk about water bills go for it.lol

Courageous Grace said...

I'm not a military wife (for which I am grateful, don't think I could handle it), and my hubby has never been away for longer than a week...

But I cried when I read this. I am sending you a hug

<--------*.*-------->

because I feel for you. God Bless you!

Sister Mary Martha said...

Your going to have to go with St. Monica, the patron saint of mothers of teens, here.

And the duct tape. They can't arrest you in your own home, can they?

Renee said...

I feel for you. I have teens, a husband who travels 5 days a week, and my eldest son is off to boarding school. I am left with 2 teen girls, one 10 year old boy who has to everything remotely disgusting, and 3 young, irrational children. And I'm pregnant and my favorite pants stopped fitting today. I can't even have my usual whiskey and cigarettes when things get bad, because the mere site of them still make me gag.

Would you have a stiff drink for me? Maybe we both would feel better then.

Seriously, you are in my prayers. I can't imagine having my husband gone so far for so long. Peace, my friend.

Robin said...

I wish I could say something to make things easier for you. I'm not military, but have lots of empathy for you. Husbands are good at changing the bulbs and taking out the trash, aren't they?

Anonymous said...

You make me appreciate my hubby, even though he is usually on my list of 'annoying' people. Wish I knew you personally...I would listen to your stories AND fill your gas tank for you! Hugs from Missouri ;)

momto5minnies said...

I am sorry Cris. I would imagine he is just as frustrated with being disconnected from you. Your children are probably missing Dad and acting out their sadness and frustrations.

Maybe start writing to him ... a LOT.

I guess you just take one long day at a time. (((HUGS)))

Anonymous said...

Hi! I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you. I'm an Army wife too and I always "laugh" when people say that they understand- and their husbands are only gone during the week or for a couple of weeks at a time. I think the worst part is the never-ending responsibility and not seeing an end anywhere in sight. Yes, we all know the year will pass, but it's a loooooooooong, hard year. Keep your head up- and maybe after the kiddos go to bed, drown that six pack! :)

Urban Mom said...

Wishing for the magic words to make it all better for you, but I don't have them... Thinking of you and hoping that things smooth out. And grateful for your family's sacrifice with this separation!!!

momto5minnies said...

That picture of you and your husband ... BEAUTIFUL!!!!!

Happy dreams ...

Carrie Hasson said...

it's always hard after (and during) a long weekend. They just go on and on and on. I know how you are feeling, we are half way. And we don't talk nearly as much, just the good nights, good mornings, quick say hi to the girls they miss you. so, yea it sucks but i can't seem to muster a long conversation at this point. actually he wanted to have one today but i was busy cleaning my kitchen, and it doesn't help that his long conversation wanted to include a budget lol. who needs one of those?! i just wanted you to know that you were on my mind. I can't remember how I found your blog, I think it was a mutual friend Wendy Z. Anyways, keep your chin up and keep cornering the mailman lol. He's gonna have to listen eventually or you'll just have to move on to the UPS guy...

The Farmer's Wife said...

Sounds like the kids are missing their dad just as much as you are missing your husband. My kids always act out more if their dad has been away awhile. They just don't know how to express it so they just turn into stinkers! I keep you and your family in my prayers daily. Remember it's YOUR blog, if you want to rant about anything do it. Your loyal readers understand and are here for you. (((hugs)))

Aubrey said...

We're in your corner. God bless military men and women and their families!

Kasia said...

Oh, man. Cris, you can e-mail me any time - I will gladly listed about water bills and Angelina Jolie. My e-mail's in the About Me section of my blog. I know it's not the same as talking to the love of your life, but it's all I've got...

Well, that and a reaffirmation of the invitation to you and your young'uns, that is if you haven't killed them by January, to come to Detroit for the wedding. It's just a luncheon reception, so only wine, but hey - I will put you next to the best listeners I know!!! :-)

(hug)

Anonymous said...

I can so relate!! I only have one, but I had my hands full the last deployment. Now, we're suddenly getting ready to retire. I didn't even get as many calls as you and I'll never forget the one where I heard the loudest boombang I've ever heard and then dead silence at the other end. It took him 3 days to call again and the whole time, I couldn't let kiddo know anything was wrong. The freezer died losing about $1,000 worth of food and our daughter got attacked in the face by a dog. Rough deployment. Now we're retiring and that scares me as much as any deployment. So, I can relate to any and all things you're feeling. I got really worried when I started answering myself in another voice!! HAHA Hang on and know your military sisters are all here for you!!

StacyRenee said...

I can so relate with you. I keep saying I need my backup back. To many things to do and to many appointments. It's me the 4 babies and the 4 dogs and 2 cats and the turtle and fish. LOL then add in the drill team, special olympics, girl scouts, church functions and the regular day to day goings on. I have a to do list that could wrap around the world. My rental people are killing me with the inability to come fix anything. The trucks in storage, the van is out of gas, both rider and push mower are broke and we have an acre yard that needs mowed BAD. All my friends are in CO. We got dropped here in Sep. he left in Oct. and has sprung the news on me that we are moving in May and he wont even be home till Dec/Jan. But I love my life even if its really hard when they deploy.

Pedge said...

Cris,
Heya. I'm new to your blog and am enjoying every minute. Just a note to say I am thinking of you today and missing your husband too! LOL, Pedge

Dareth said...

5 out of 6 of our overhead kitchen lights burned out before I finally broke down and changed them while my husband was deployed.

It does stink. It is not glamorous.

But, loving that military man, it's the best job around! They make it all worth it (after they are home again :).

MKHKKH said...

Time for a chick flick and a good cry. HUGS to you brave and strong mama.