9.08.2008

This May Be What Heaven Is Like...

Has anyone ever been to a Red Robin?

Yesterday was my first time and let me just say... I think I'm in love.

First of all... they had televisions everywhere playing football. Heaven.

Secondly... the burgers are the size of Rhode Island (I mean, it was as if I was holding Rhode Island with all of it's Rhode Islanders in my hands preparing to eat them all). People have told me in the past that I have a big mouth, but I think I may have sprained my jaw opening my mouth so big to eat the darn thing. I didn't even have one of the specialty burgers-like the one with the kitchen sink on top. I am a center line type of eater... I don't stray to far away from normal. Cheeseburger-yes, Cheeseburger with goat cheese, onion rings, confetti and frog legs-no.

Lastly... their fries come in a "bottomless basket." When the waiter told me that, I could have swore I heard my hips get wider and my butt add a few cellulite dents to it. These aren't your regular skinny, greasy fries either... these are steak fries, with a really yummy seasoning salt on top that cries out for you to throw your manners aside and suck on every last one of your fingers after each bite just to get every bit of salt that you can. Who cares about water gain... these are BOTTOMLESS FRIES!

After leaving I told the kids how much I loved of this place. I praised it as if Jesus himself were our waiter... and they give you a balloon when you leave!

Then I told them that we are NEVER coming back!

How Red Robin expects me to stay my normal 10lbs overweight is beyond me. If I made Red Robin a regular in our eating circle, I would be 50lbs. overweight by Christmas. The bottomless fries alone would cause me to have to ride around in a motorized cart at Target.

Oh the injustice of it all... when two lovers are forced to be separated for the greater good of humanity.




20 comments:

Anonymous said...

I told you Red Robin was awesome!
Claire

StacyRenee said...

The deserts are so mouth watering good. I miss having one right down the street. okay now I'm off to find one with in a 100 miles.

Anonymous said...

You might also be interested to know that if you sign up on their website, you get a free burger on your birthday! Talk about hearing your hips expand...

Fuzzy said...

I am a HUGE RR fan myself! Not only is the free burger on your birthday (be sure to sign the WHOLE family up!) great, but let me tell you, on top of that, when they sing "happy birthday" you get an AMAZING dessert! Ice cream sundae. *smack smack*

Did you try the Milkshakes? Mmm. Also, if you are in the mood, you can substitute onion rings for your fries (not bottomless, but delish!). AND, if you ever decide to try another "specialty burger" I would highly recommend the Royal Red Robin burger. The one with the fried egg on top. You won't be hungry for days.

Great. Now I'm hungry...

Stupid Fat Hobbit said...

June, you lived 2 blocks from a Red Robin when you were in Woodbridge (okay, maybe 6 blocks) how did you never stop there??? Did you know that every priest in the Arlington Diocese will go to supper with you if you say that you're going to Red Robin? If they have a meeting with the Bishop; they'll bring him along! You should try it there with your priest! BTW, I've finally posted again. Also, I noticed that you went over 100,000 visits!! Congratulations.
Last thing, if you order your burger without the bun; you don't get so full and you can go back within a week or so without so much guilt.

Jennie said...

I used to live not so far from a Red Robin in AZ. They are SO good- and so BAD too.... I love your current music selection by the way- tears come to my eyes every time.

Kasia said...

I've been to Red Robin once, or maybe twice, but it was when I was a vegetarian so I just had a Garden Burger. (sniff)

It was actually kind of funny - I was there with two Hindu guys who ordered regular cow-flesh burgers, and there was me, the one who was actually ALLOWED to eat meat, munching away on my soy-based substitute...

Just The Girl said...

OMG! I love fries and I can NEVER go there or I would be 350 lbs in two days....LOL

Anonymous said...

and have you ever tried their Cobb Salad...it is way too good. It is so good I have them hold the crumbled bacon and it's still wonderful...with honey mustard dresing it's the best. And low in points on WW!
Love,
Aunt Barbara

Army Wife said...

btw...you were nominated for a milbloggie!!

Kelli said...

I know, it's so good it's ridiculous! However, to alleviate the guilt, they DO have a fabulous salad called the Whiskey River Chicken Salad or something, and it is AMAZING. Salad is healthy, even with fried onion strings, fried chicken, tons of ranch dressing, and bbq sauce, right?

kaylasaid said...

Ooohhh Red Robin brings back memories of my college days.. My roommate and I would order a basket of bottomless fries and split a chocolate shake. Wish I could still eat like that. :)

The Farmer's Wife said...

I love RR too. When we are doing all our Christmas shopping at the mall (that is where our RR is) we eat there. The foccacia (sp?) club is soooooo yummy.

momto5minnies said...

Oh my ... that is one fat burger! I would have to eat it with a fork and knife (TMJ for me).

IT's okay to splurge every once in a while. Although I do find that when I go out to eat, I try to finish my plate and that is just an insane amount of food and calories. Maybe you should just grab a girlfriend/sister and SPLIT the entire meal. That should be enough food especially when you will need to cleanse your palate with a great big DRINK;)

Krystle said...

Can I just tell you that is my most favorite restaurant EVER?!?! Especially the Royal Red Robin Burger w/ the egg! TO.DIE.FOR!!

Great, now I'm hungry for RR. At 7:45 am. Go figure!

Cousin Steve said...

That is the best picture you have put on your blog. Period.

That picture alone is flipping me into a hunger rage. It is if I can smell that dog gone thing through the screen.

I must have one.

I must have one now.

Regina said...

for sure RR is the best place ever, especially with kids because it is usually loud in there so if the little ones start acting up no biggie.
i too am a regular burger type of gal so i usually just get the gourmet burger without relish add swiss cheese. now sometimes if i am not in a burger mood i get the turkey blt-very good. for both though i cut it in half and eat the rest another time (though the fries don't reheat well). they also have some new garlic fries which are pretty good. for dessert you have to try the mile high mud pie...yummmy though i usually jsut eat the whipped cream and sprinkles they load it with (alright i might have a bite or 2 of the cookie crust).
for appetizer i like the cheeseburger con queso.
and to drink the kids like the strawberry lemonade.
yeah, i obviously eat there FAR TOO OFTEN!!
r

Amy B. said...

Cris -

Where the hell where you guys when you were hanging out in Lake Ridge? Eliana could have told you it was her favorite place - the big bird and all! "Mom, can we go and get your picture taken again this week with the bird?"

Love, Amy P.S. We miss you greatly.

Cris said...

Amy! Did you see where I used your quote on the "Spanish" post? Quarter Ricans... thought of only you when I wrote it. Priceless.

Miss you-come visit!!!

Bekah said...

Do you like BBQ sauce? Try the Whisky River BBQ Burger. Or the W.R. BBQ Chicken burger. OR EVEN the Whisky River BBQ Chicken Salad. It comes on lettuce, so you feel better about eating it, but I'm sure it's more fattening than a burger... Dude, now I want Red Robin, too! If it weren't 10 o'oclock at night and RR weren't soooo far away, and all my kids weren't already asleep, I'd so be there!