7.30.2008

He Was Just Trying To Save The World...


Walendowski is accused of shooting his lawn mower because it wouldn't start. According to the criminal complaint, Walendowski said he was angry because his Lawn Boy wouldn't start Wednesday morning, July 23, 2008. He told police quote, 'I can do that, it's my lawn mower and my yard so I can shoot it if I want.'
I completely understand Mr. Walendowski. I have tried to shoot my lawn mower on many occasions, but found that my son's Nerf gun just didn't offer the satisfaction I was looking for. Next time take a hammer to it. Your neighbors won't call the police on you-they'll just watch out their front window wondering just what kind of entertainment you will be providing next week.
If Mr. Walendowski goes to jail, lawn mowers everywhere will think they can just stop working. Before you know it they will be demanding the same pay as the weed whacker and asking for the week of July 1-7 off. Soon there will be a law passed that a lawn mower can marry a edger and then where will we be? We'll have uncut lawns and weeds creeping over our sidewalks.
Please Mister Jailer... won't you let Mr. Walendowski go free?

12 comments:

Laura said...

I was going to post about this today....but you did a much more clever job than I would have...besides I am afraid of this man.
Incidently, I would like to shoot my laptop, VCR, and microwave sometimes....I'm just saying.

Beth Cotell said...

This mugshot reminds me a little of Nick Nolte's. And I think pehaps they are both mentally unstable!

Danielle said...

Pretty mugshot!

Soul Pockets said...

I am glad he is not my neighbor. I too think taking a hammer to it would have been a little less crazy approach. But he is right, his yard his lawn mower.

Anonymous said...

I think I want whatever that guy is drinking! Could you do me a favor and research that for me! Thanks!!

Anonymous said...

I almost forgot!! Could you also find out who his barber is and make me an appointment. Thanks!!

june cleaver said...

I think he drinks Jack and Coke? My sources say that is the drink of choice. Also, he travels to Griffith Indiana to get his haircut.

Anonymous said...

That's the funniest thing I've heard all day. (I have a sad life.. I know LOL)

Stupid Fat Hobbit said...

My father-in-law, and you think you have problems with your relatives. Oh well, at least it's not a blood relative. BTW, this is not actually his mugshot, this was a picture taken on during the honeymoon with his 8th wife.

P.S. I notice that most people are concentrating on him and not on your further comments about weed whackers, edgers and marriage. Judging from some of the recent comments I've read here, I'm sure that several of your new readers will be totally offended and let you know that it is sacriligious to discuss lawn mower marriages in this horrific way.

Finally, I have to agree with Soul Pockets, his yard, his lawnmover, his gun, unless he borrowed the lawnmower from a neighbor, he's got a good case!

momto5minnies said...

so long as the weed wackers & lawn mowers are open to life...


(lot's of endings to choose from... use your imagination)

Big Doofus (Roger) said...

I shot an edger in Reno,
Just to watch it die.


Found your site vie A Mountain Homeschooler. Nicely done.

CI-Roller Dude said...

What I do as a police range master and overdeployednationalguardsmen is:
I take offending items to the range and shoot them there. Old cell phones are among my favorite items to shoot...