7.28.2008

It's Just Jokes Baby... Just Jokes

After we had baby #4 my husband and I thought it was time to move on to the next stage of life... the one where you eventually get to sleep through the night and no longer have to look at each other and say "Do you smell poo? Check the baby."

My brain has become very comfortable with the idea that we were done having babies.

Yesterday Carl turned to me and said: "You know, since we already have four kids we might as well have a fifth."

I stood in silence. WHAT? Was he serious? How could this be?

Then he started laughing... he was obviously joking. I was so mad at him that I could have spit nails. He didn't understand why I was being so irrational (he has learned to use the word "irrational" instead of "insane").

I tried to explain to him that although my brain is completely in sync with no more babies, my uterus apparently feels different. When he says things like "let's have another baby" my body immediately starts to ovulate and my ovaries just start tossing out eggs at an alarming rate. I instantly gain 5 lbs. of baby fat around my belly in order to protect the mere thought of another pregnancy, and I could have sworn that a hemorrhoid popped out... I'm not sure.

So a lesson to all you men out there who think if would be "funny" to suggest another baby-STOP! It is cruel and unusual punishment to put a women through that. I mean, when the man I love looks at me and says "Wanna have another baby?" my fallopian tubes do a little happy dance and I find myself buying packages of newborn diapers just so I can get all gaga over how little they are.

Not funny... not funny at all.

23 comments:

Soliloquy said...

Oh to just nurse another baby.....

What's up with THAT?!

Colleen said...

I think YOU seem ready to have another baby...in fact, with a hubbie that looks like yours, and being Catholic, how do you not have 17 kids by now? Slacker ;-)

Katy said...

Four is a very good number. Men can be "irrational"... shame on him!

Kasia said...

I think six is a good number... ;-)

The Farmer's Wife said...

I am in the same boat. I mean the brain says,"No Freakin' Way" and the uterus says,"oh just one more time"

Beth (A Mom's Life) said...

"...and I could have sworn that a hemorrhoid popped out..."

Thanks for a Monday evening laugh!!

Soul Pockets said...

Yesterday I posted on my blog about how I was thinking of having #5. My husband reads my blog at work, he actually called me from work to tell me how scared he was after reading my blog. LOL So it is the other way around for us. It is those darn newborn diapers that get me every time!

MomDaBomb said...

Hi! I am a bit shocked by your comment and how it will affect others. I can understand your humor (funny!) but others that are not Catholic may read that as a bit insensitive to our beliefs at the Church's teachings. Please be careful on these touchy topics. You may want to expand on God's Will and your love between you and your husband. Many women out there would die to be in your shoes to become pregnant. (believe me, I learned the hard way since I am a fertile mertile (sp?) and friends shared with me the many miscarriages they had and the pain and sorrow accompanied them.
THanks for taking this into consideration.
(p.,s. Having more children is NOT THAT BAD!!!)

June Cleaver said...

MomDaBomb... no where in my post did I say that having more children is a bad thing. No where did I even say that my husband and I were taking any measures that would make it impossible to have more children. No where did I mention that we are not open to new life... if you remember, WE HAVE 4 CHILDREN. I simply said that we were looking at the next stage in life-a life that is celebrated with God for the children and the marriage that we have.
Thank you for your comment.

~June Cleaver

MomDaBomb said...

I can see that you "did not say...." but I was letting you know how it came across to others, thats all. Calm down. I am not trying to start a fight but letting you know how others may perceive you in the spotlight. You need to be prepared for being in the public (even with a blog) can influence people. Thats all.
I still enjoy your blog.

God bless.
p.s. as far as being open to life and 4 children...thank you for this but I know of couples that were not being open to life and still have 4 children. (I am not accusing you of this but once again letting you know.)

June Cleaver said...

Mamadabomb, Being open to life does not mean you get pregnant every opportunity that you can. I think you are forgetting that being open to life is a great sacrifice-the sacrifice for those who do get pregnant often (yes, children are a blessing, but there is also suffereing involved-thank you Eve)and the sacrifice for those (like my husband and I) who have made the decision to abstain and control ourselves.
I am not here to preach. We are all God's children and we all do the best with what we are handed. I just want you to know how self righteous and judgemental you sound. You should be prepared for that when you make a comment on a blog.
You see the sliver in your friend's eye, but you don't see the timber in your own eye. When you take the timber out of your own eye, then you will see well enough to remove the sliver from your friend's eye
I am not picking a fight either... banter is banter-who are we if we cannot converse.

Candy Cook said...

Well, I thought it was funny. I like to make that joke on my husband all the time. "We don't have a girl, maybe we should try for one?" hahaha... he always gives me a look of confusion mixed with the one used to lure women of baby-making age - I guess just to cover both bases at once.

MomDaBomb said...

Okay, converse...we can do that.

I am not implying that you are not open to life (it is not my business)-and I agree that it is not at every opportunity either-many I know are open to life and can only have a certain number, be it one, none or more (due to many issues).

But, I applaud your honesty on this issue.

As far as the sliver/timber comment, please also be careful on what you are saying since neither one of us knows the depth of each other. All I am saying is to please be careful on how you state things on your blog, that's all. I am very aware of the wood issues in my life-if you only really knew me.

I am not one to pick fight-not even one to converse on such issues so tender to the heart. I felt compelled to write something. It is a type of fraternal charity to help another sister- to see what she may have said hurt people, or at least hurt me, no matter what the cost or division it may bring.

Thanks for your comments too.

How about we leave it at that.

God bless.

Jamie said...

I don't have kids yet - we have been married for less than 2 years but I ache for them! I thought your post was funny. I also read your last few posts and enjoyed them thoroughly! I'm not a drinker so I don't have experience in the bars but your post about the guy who sent a napkin with his number so you could text him cracked me up. So lame!
By the way, I saw Mamma Mia last weekend with my mom, sisters, aunt, and granny. We were staying at a beach house for vacation and came back to the house and sang (*ahem* screamed) "Dancing Queen" for our husbands as we paraded through the front door. They did not appreciate it. I loved that movie and I will definitely see it again!

Sorry for the novel. I saw your comment on Ree's site and meandered over.

June Cleaver said...

Momdabomb, you are right... I don't know you. I only know me-and that is what I write about.

Tomorrow I will talk about something less controversial-how about eyelash tinting, the pros and cons.

*wink*

Anonymous said...

Yeah, eyelash tinting. I can't wait!
2 points for June!
Love,
Aunt B

momto5minnies said...

Well I enjoyed this bit of humor.

I was a little suprised to see the responses ... AMEN to your comeback Cris. I am not sure if your critic is Catholic, but maybe she needs to read up a little on what the Catholic church teaches. Hmmmmm ...

I don't think being open to life means keep having babies until your uterus falls out. Prayer and thought go into it.

AND Cris ... I don't know much about eyelash tinting, but my husband can recommend a great mascara for ya!

Jacqueline said...

Ok...is there something in the air... my hubbie 51 asked me 49..."Do you think we could have another baby?"....we have 7 (ages 18 to5)..I think my body is pretty well finished menopause, I replied. "Oh, " he sighed, "I really like babies".... my girlfriend said we could adopt...God only knows.
I do love my man though.... he "loves the fruit of the gift"...I am truly blessed

Jacqueline said...

Ok...is there something in the air... my hubbie 51 asked me 49..."Do you think we could have another baby?"....we have 7 (ages 18 to5)..I think my body is pretty well finished menopause, I replied. "Oh, " he sighed, "I really like babies".... my girlfriend said we could adopt...God only knows.
I do love my man though.... he "loves the fruit of the gift"...I am truly blessed

wendyz said...

Wow Cris, It's like a bad conversation in a room. Still makes you feel uncomfortable miles away. How are you? Will you send over some blogging power this way?

Stupid Fat Hobbit said...

You better be careful on that R&R Carl gets in 6 months 8-P
Could be dangerous.

It's funny you chose eyelash tinting, I was following some links through blogs this morning and came across this one blog where the lady does mani/pedi/eyelash tinting. I thought it was humorous but I guess I need to catch up on my 'Things women do to make themselves look pretty that a guy would never, ever, EVER figure out in a million, zillion years'. Maybe I could write a book about it.

God bless.

Jennie said...

I loved your post. Kids make me tired (I have only five myself) and allthough every pregnancy a blessing for sure, comes with that mix of joy and "this is insanity" fear and trembling. When your beloved is going to be away it gets especially bad, that baby hunger (like eating when you aren't hungry, just because it is so good) is at its worst. Almost like trying to keep a piece of him home with you. Which, I suppose, is true. When I know my hubby will be traveling my cycle is always messed up and I nearly always ovulate right before he leaves. Stress leads to fighting, and it is icky to be separated on poor terms so usually the choice is to relieve the stress, which is why we have five children under the age of 11. -Jennie
P.S. Your family is in our prayers. I am sure this is a tough week (and upcoming year) for you all. For what it is worth my cousin has been over and back three times now and so I think our prayers have worked well sofar. If you come up to Minnesota we can show you all a good time, and even get you to the Irish Catholic Chruch the next morning (or the Catholic Church built by the Germans, silly folks, couldn't they join hands and over look their differences, after all they both loved their beer)

Lanxi said...

We thought we were ready to move on to the next stage when our 4 were older, and then came number 5! Now we are waiting for number 6 to make an appearance. (Can't have odd numbers)

For us, everyone else thinks we should keep having babies so they can get their fix and keep their families in the order that it is.

Love my babies, and love the surprise blessings that come along with them!