I woke up this morning in a cold sweat and was unable to get back to sleep. I realized that I am a really bad mom. My children do not have photo albums displaying their milestones. I am a failure.
How did I let this happen? I take pictures of my kids. I have 3 cameras for Pete's sake. I even have 2 photo printers! But I do not have any of these photos in albums with cute paper and witty captions attached to any of them.
My children will all grow up and say "Mom? Why do you not have any scrapbooks of me growing up?" and all I will be able to say it "Sorry... I am pitiful."
When Hope came along I gave it a good try and she actually has 2 baby books and 3 photo albums, but we have nothing after the age of 3 for her. Aaron was born when she was three and I have 1 baby book for him and 1 album. You can see how my success was failing. When Emma was born, I finally filled out her baby book when she was 2 and she has a very small photo album that consists of photos from the day she was born... that is all. Poor Mary. I have a baby book for her, but I have not put anything in it since I scribbled in the date that she was born. She has no photo albums. All of her pictures are either still on a digital camera or on this here computer.
I do have shoe boxes and shoe boxes full of photos. This drives my sister-in-law crazy. She is a scrap booking expert. She even has an entire room in her house devoted to her scrap booking... and when I say that I mean that it is not only called the "scrapbook room" but she bought special organizing furniture for this room from IKEA that makes it look so-what is the word I am looking for?-ORGANIZED!
My children will have to look through Rubbermaid tubs full of old Nike shoe boxes in order to look at the memories of their lives. Not only that, but I will die and my children will say "Do you remember what mom looked like?" because there is not one stinking picture of me around this place.
I have to place part of my photo album ineptness on my mother. The woman who I asked if she had developed the photos she took at my wedding and she looked at me with a blank stare and said "I didn't take pictures at your wedding." and I said "Yes you did mom! I have a picture from someone else and you are in the background taking a picture!" My mother's reply: "Oh, I better go look for that film."
I also do not have a baby book. My brother and older sister both have baby books, and my little sister has a baby book... but I do not have one. My parents must have been too busy-whatever, that is fine. I am not bitter. Sheesh.
The worst part of this "I have to start photo albums for my children so they know that they did indeed have a good childhood!" mission is that I can't start organizing now because we are going to move in a few months and whatever I start will just get lost in the shuffle. I have to make a long-term plan for this dilemma. Is it too early to make a 2009 New Year's Resolution?
If there is anyone out there that wants to start a business where they scrapbook other people's pictures and memories, well let me know! I will pay a hefty price to get these memories put together for my children so that one day when I am old and fragile I can look through them with my grandchildren and show them how much their parents were loved. That is all I want~