Oh For The Love of God...

Murphy loves my family.

For the past 4 months I have been cleaning this house in order to sell/rent it. My children all have ulcers now because they never know if I am going to blow up because they have taken out a toy to play with, or if they have walked on a freshly vacuumed carpet, or if they have just pooped in a freshly scrubbed toilet.

My husband has been banned from showering at our home because of the hairs that simply spring off of his body each time he towels off and fall onto my scrubbed and sparkling bathroom floor.

The dog has no idea where to lay down to take a nap because she is constantly being tossed in the back yard so that I could sweep, and the sight of her dog hair on my hardwood floors is enough to send me ranting and threatening to sell her to the lowest bidder.

Our house has been living at Defcon 1.

I have shown this house to well over 50 million potential buyers/renters (I am not kidding... 50 MILLION!). Each of them have told me how much they love my house and how clean it is. None of these people who have been in my home, walked through my bedrooms, laid eyes on my bathrooms, peeked in my private closets and rummaged through my attic, have decided that they want to live in my house. This house that I have cleaned until my hands are raw and my family is afraid to sit on the furniture for fear of leaving a butt imprint.

Today we signed a lease with a wonderful family who has fallen in love with our house.

They never came out to walk through the house. They chose to rent it solely on the photos that I have on the web. The same photos that I took one afternoon before I started Cleangate 2008. The photos where I simply took all the crap out of the room I was photographing and had it piled up behind me and then replaced when I was done taking the picture.

All the cleaning that I have done is kind of like shaving my legs when my husband is out of town. Pointless.

Curse you Murphy!