I have looked at all of your calculated contributing ideas of swoonworthy men for the Six-Pack and I have to tell ya-you all are good...no, not good... you all are GUUD!
I am not gonna put a one of those men on this week's Wednesday Swoon.
Well because... I don't want to.
And also, because I am going to put every last stinking one of them on next week's MONDAY Swoon... not to be confused with the WEDNESDAY Swoon, or even the FRIDAY Mascot (Buzzy) Swoon.
So quit sending suggestions-you have given me too much work as it is... and to be honest, that is why I am not putting them on the Wednesday edition of the Monday Swoon because I am too damn lazy this week.
That is right.
I am LAZY.
BUT, because I love you so very mucho grande Taco Bell, I am not going to leave you empty swoonded.
You can thank me later... right now just listen and look and enjoy.
The other night I went to go see the movie The Hangover.
Oh my loving mother of Betty Crocker! This is hands down the FUNNIEST movie I have EVER seen. I am still giggling to myself when I think about it...
As soon as you are done reading this blog and wiping the drool off your chin for the photogs you are about to view, go directly to your local movie viewing establishment and watch this movie. You will not be sorry--I bet it is even better if you consume a couple of loaded beers first, which is precisely what I am going to do when I go see it a second time. I am going after I am good and drunk and I am going to laugh until I pee my pants and then throw up on the college kid in front of me.
Anyway... in this movie is someone who I have been watching for a while now but have not put on the swoon.
"Why not June?"
I don't know really-I guess it is because he always plays a jerk in movies-but he is a hot jerk so all is forgiven. I mean, you know a man is hot when he can be a jerk and you say "But look at his blue eyes. I bet I can change him. Yeah, he wouldn't be a jerk to ME."
But in this movie-he ain't no jerk and he looks really really really really really really good.
So Ladies of the Six-Pack, I introduce to you for the FIRST time on the Swoon (but definitely not to be the last because I think I may like to look at him just about as much as I like to look at Gerry Butler, Matt McCon, Robward Pattinson and Christian hayBale.) our newest addition to the family... Bradley Cooper.
Hello T-R-O-U-B-L-E. You are going to make all the other fellas on the Swoon list jealous aren't ya Bradley? Oh yes you are.... My Mama never told me about nothing like Y-O-U!
Come on in baby... the water is perfect.
Let's all be silent for a moment here and just look at this man laughing. I mean, you know you are going to have a good time with a guy who can look like that when he laughs-Shhhhh. Just look at him and try not to smile, and try not to think about what he may be laughing at... you won't be able to do it and before you know it, it will be an hour later and you will still be sitting on this blog fantasizing about what he is laughing at and smiling the entire time like a silly little school girl with a dirtly little secret.
I bet he read my blog and thought it was just so damn funny.
Where was I?
Oh yes.... moving on.
He even looks good dirty and beaten up. I am diggin' the Rays-I have a pair like that and a friend told me that I look like a cop when I wear them. Well Mr. Cooper, if you look like a cop... I insist upon a frisking!
Don't you just want to take him home and prop him up on your couch and stare at him? His smile alone could make me happy. Pure and simple.
Okay Six-Packers, this last photog is for you... it needs a caption. Give it to me in the comments-the best caption wins-what do you win? The Hangover Soundtrack!! That is right... IT IS CONTEST TIME!!!!!! I have two... count em' TWO soundtracks to give away-one will go to the winner of the Random number finder thingamajiger and the other will go to the one caption that makes me laugh the most.
I need to laugh people-you have your marching orders... now get to work and entertain me!
Oh yeah... you have until Monday because I am not going to be around for the next couple of days. I am off on an expedition-one to far away lands that have beer and prolly some tequilla, but I am not going to partake in such things. Pfffft. Who am I freakin' kidding?
So since I won't be here for the Friday News... here ya go.
Enjoy and I'll see ya on the flip side of the weekend.