It is snowing in Omaha today. Not your typical flurries... no, it is dumping snow from the heavens upon the land that I call home.
groan.
All of this snow meant that school was cancelled.
groan.
So I did what any wonderful mother would do and I plowed my van through the snow directly to Blockbuster and proceeded to rent $25 worth of movies for the kids to enjoy. Then I traipsed over to Super Target where I bought pizza pockets, smiley face french fries, chips, dip, soda, frozen pizza, ice cream, waffles and chocolate syrup. Oh, and milk-I am responsible.
groan.
So far we have watched Madagascar 2 and Open Season 2. If you have the choice, rent Madagascar 2... we laughed our little butts off. Open Season 2 was stupid... don't rent it. Oh, and we all have upset stomachs. I don't know why.
groan.
Now if you will excuse me, I have to go curse loudly whilst I shovel my three-car-wide driveway.
groan.
I forgot to buy beer.
groan.
Happy Valentine's Day.
groan.
.
2.13.2009
Gerard Butler, Edward Cullen and Cousin Stevella...
If I were living in a cave I would be able to tell that Valentine's Day is just around the corner. How would I be able to tell you ask? Well, by all of the google searches that have brought people to the Six-Pack.
No one wants to know the typical searches anymore, like "June Cleaver naked" or "Butt Cysts." No, during crunch time, which is the week leading up to Valentine's Day, people (women) want to know other things... happier things... things that will make them forget that their husband does not "believe" in Valentine's Day and refuses to bend down to "the man" by purchasing a card and flowers. They have to console themselves because there is no dinner plans in their future and the thought of going to see a romantic comedy at the movie theater is about as likely as winning the lottery when you don't buy a ticket.
So let this be a warning to you men out there who complain and gripe about having to show your wife how important she is to you... or showing the world how much you love her (which is all she wants really-to be able to receive the flowers at the front door so that all of the neighbors witness it and say "WOW! Her husband must really really love her. She is so lucky.")
If you don't do anything she will be spending the night looking at this:
Because I have had close to 1000 hits a day for the last week on this photog alone, so it is either lonely wives, or Gerard Butler himself trying to get my attention... and since my husband is deployed and falls in that "Valen-What?" category, I am happy to think the old Gerry is looking at me across the Internet saying, in his Irish accent, "Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by you again?" So don't rain on my parade and tell me that Gerard Butler has no idea who I am, because just like Matthew McConaughey, I am happy in my insanity pretending that they do.
Anyway...
This is the next photog that has sent many a sad lady to the Six-Pack this week:
I know fellas, you HATE Edward Cullen and you HATE Robert Pattinson even more, but I hate to tell you that he has three more movies to put out so he is going to be around for a while... so instead of stomping your foot and hiding you wife's Twilight book, why don't you dress up like a vampire and try and be like him this Valentine's Day? You'll have to be a mysterious loner with a tortured soul... oh, and save her from danger and want her so badly that you may just kill her. Er, maybe not. I can tell right now you are all reading that wrong and you do not understand anything I just said.
Sigh.
Interestingly enough, this is the third photog that has sent people my way this week. I don't believe it is from the ladies either... actually I think it is from the fellas over at Threedonia, but I am not pointing fingers (trzupr).
Is that Spencer in the background? Does Cousin Stevella know Heidi and Spencer? Oh, I need to have a serious chat with her about who she is hanging out with. My mother always said that you are judged by the company you keep. Ugh.
So just a friendly reminder that Valentine's Day is tomorrow, and unless you want your wife to leave you for a vampire, I suggest you take my advice and man up.
That's right... MAN UP!
Stop moaning and complaining that you have to show your love to this woman who takes care of your kids, cleans your shorts, scrubs your toilet, cooks your food, does your taxes, finds a contractor to put in the granite counters, prices out carpet for your home at no less than three carpet stores, finds a painter to paint your house... wait, what was I talking about?
Oh yeah... Love your wife! She deserves it!
If not, I'm sure Gerry will be walking by.
2.11.2009
Apparently Is Does Not Take A Village...
Okay, so I watched the interview last night with the mother of the newly born octuplets, Nadya Sulman.
This is what I find so interesting about all of this, the media has once again tried to make the decision for all Americans as to whether or not a person is worthy of a good standing. What ever happened to "It takes a Village" to raise a child? Well, obviously the village (that is run by the media) has decided that this mother does not deserve any help because she went about things in a manner that they deemed "wrong!"
I personally do not agree with her actions, but that does not excuse me from helping eight little babies... or six older siblings. Why do we continue to punish a child for a parent's actions?
Nadya does not fit in the box in which the media deems worthy. She is not married. She is unemployed. She already had six children. She does not represent the perfect American family that has 2 children and uses contraceptives for the rest of their lives to keep it that way.
Would I have so many children? Goodness I hope not, but let me point out this one amazing fact to you all...
It was God who created each of these souls. It was God that wove them all in her womb. It was God that knew she would be an outcast and life would be extremely difficult and I believe He will stand beside her (when Americans chose to turn away from her) and support her.
You may be saying "Sure, but is God going to pay the water bill?" Yes... He will.
The media will never point out the fact that God played the most important part in all of this. They will say it is unethical. They will say she is unfit. They will (and have) make it all sound so terrible that diaper companies will ignore her, formula companies will ignore her and even Chevrolet will ignore her!
I mean come on... families with multiples have all done what she did, in vitro fertilization, but because they were married and cute, the endorsements came in. My kids love to watch Jon and Kate Plus 8 who have a television show, and it seems to me like they are always going on some vacation that some nice person has paid for for them. Kate even had her tummy tucked for free! Don't get me wrong-I think it is great, but I think it is a little silly that so many people are amazed that this family of eight children are so interesting that the show is a hit.
But Nadya will get nothing and she will still go home and try her best to raise her children, in spite of what Sociology professors are saying about "the lack of attention to each child will cause mental harm." Gee... let's dig those babies a hole to climb out of before they can even walk why don't we?
But I forget that many Americans think it is acceptable to have 2.5 children and the families with more are looked at as "weird." We only have 4 kids and so many people think we are nuts, but I just tell them that "Yes we are nuts... but I can't keep my husband off of me." That usually leaves them speechless.
I know that many people have an opinion on this, and that is fine. I just hope that our opinion of Nadya (who I personally found as sweet and pleasant) does not affect what we think of her children... or children in general.
The day that the media starts saying that children are a burden and when we as Americans start saying things like "Why should my tax dollars go to pay for so many children?" will be a sad day in my opinion. China comes to mind...
Just last night my daughter Hope was reading from the Bible for her Religion homework...
“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’
“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”
—Matthew 25:31-46
Hope looked at me when she was done reading it and said "I hope I'm on the right!" I smiled at her and took a deep breathe and said "Me too... me too."
**Update... I have spent the morning looking on NBC.com where Ann Curry said I could go to make a donation to this family. I have found nothing.**
.
This is what I find so interesting about all of this, the media has once again tried to make the decision for all Americans as to whether or not a person is worthy of a good standing. What ever happened to "It takes a Village" to raise a child? Well, obviously the village (that is run by the media) has decided that this mother does not deserve any help because she went about things in a manner that they deemed "wrong!"
I personally do not agree with her actions, but that does not excuse me from helping eight little babies... or six older siblings. Why do we continue to punish a child for a parent's actions?
Nadya does not fit in the box in which the media deems worthy. She is not married. She is unemployed. She already had six children. She does not represent the perfect American family that has 2 children and uses contraceptives for the rest of their lives to keep it that way.
Would I have so many children? Goodness I hope not, but let me point out this one amazing fact to you all...
It was God who created each of these souls. It was God that wove them all in her womb. It was God that knew she would be an outcast and life would be extremely difficult and I believe He will stand beside her (when Americans chose to turn away from her) and support her.
You may be saying "Sure, but is God going to pay the water bill?" Yes... He will.
The media will never point out the fact that God played the most important part in all of this. They will say it is unethical. They will say she is unfit. They will (and have) make it all sound so terrible that diaper companies will ignore her, formula companies will ignore her and even Chevrolet will ignore her!
I mean come on... families with multiples have all done what she did, in vitro fertilization, but because they were married and cute, the endorsements came in. My kids love to watch Jon and Kate Plus 8 who have a television show, and it seems to me like they are always going on some vacation that some nice person has paid for for them. Kate even had her tummy tucked for free! Don't get me wrong-I think it is great, but I think it is a little silly that so many people are amazed that this family of eight children are so interesting that the show is a hit.
But Nadya will get nothing and she will still go home and try her best to raise her children, in spite of what Sociology professors are saying about "the lack of attention to each child will cause mental harm." Gee... let's dig those babies a hole to climb out of before they can even walk why don't we?
But I forget that many Americans think it is acceptable to have 2.5 children and the families with more are looked at as "weird." We only have 4 kids and so many people think we are nuts, but I just tell them that "Yes we are nuts... but I can't keep my husband off of me." That usually leaves them speechless.
I know that many people have an opinion on this, and that is fine. I just hope that our opinion of Nadya (who I personally found as sweet and pleasant) does not affect what we think of her children... or children in general.
The day that the media starts saying that children are a burden and when we as Americans start saying things like "Why should my tax dollars go to pay for so many children?" will be a sad day in my opinion. China comes to mind...
Just last night my daughter Hope was reading from the Bible for her Religion homework...
“When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left. Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’
“Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”
—Matthew 25:31-46
Hope looked at me when she was done reading it and said "I hope I'm on the right!" I smiled at her and took a deep breathe and said "Me too... me too."
**Update... I have spent the morning looking on NBC.com where Ann Curry said I could go to make a donation to this family. I have found nothing.**
.
2.10.2009
Call Me When They Invent Something Useful...
I started thinking of all of the modern conveniences that we enjoy on a daily basis because someone (probably a mother) said things like "wouldn't it make life easier if..." and then her husband invented something and took all of the credit. Men.
1905: The windshield Wiper was invented. That is a good one because we have all had a car at one time that did not have working wipers and when it would rain we made our friends hang out the passenger side and manually wipe the windshields with a napkin from Chick-Fil-A.
1908: Cellophane was invented... causing all mothers and grandmothers to jump for joy and wrap everything in sight including their hair after they put color in it, put rollers in it and I have personally seen my grandmother wrap her new hairdo in cellophane when she couldn't find her shower cap before her bath.
1909: Instant coffee was invented... which could have brought about world peace if it was marketed correctly.
1919: The pop-up toaster was invented... now if they could just figure out a way to clean the toaster without getting crumbs all over the counter, kitchen floor, sink, your clothes, the baby and the dog... then I will be impressed.
1928: Bubble Gum was invented... my children would like to shake that man's hand, and just about every mother in the world would like to beat him to a bloody pulp when said child goes to bed with their gum and wakes up (the day of school pictures no less) with it all through their lovely hair.
1935: Canned Beer was invented... I bet this guy was Irish, and I bet he was somehow related to me.
1943: The slinky and silly putty was invented... my mother never let us play with silly putty, or play dough for that matter. We were only allowed to do chores for fun while my mother napped on the couch and called for more wine. God I love that woman.
1946: The microwave oven was invented... and that was the first Thanksgiving where everyone had their Turkey done in 25 minutes flat. It was a little tough... but it made life easier right?
1948: The frisbee and velcro were invented. I could care less about the frisbee (although dogs everywhere are thankful) but the velcro! Oh God Bless the velcro! None of my children know how to actually tie their shoes, but they can get them on and get in the van in no time flat without bothering me. Genius!
1949: Cake Mix was invented... coming from a non-baker, I think this is great. My grandmother thought a cake mix cake was a sign of stupidity.
1972: I was invented (rather, I was invented in 1971, but born in 1972) and the video game Pong. Greatest year to date I think.
1974: Post-it notes were invented... and husband's everywhere would like to beat the crap out of the guy who helped their wife leave little notes that say "take out the trash", "fix the door knob", "put the toilet seat down" and even "we are out of beer."
1979: Cell phones, the walkman and rollerblades were invented. All things that I love, all things that I used-well, I didn't use a cell phone back then, I was only 7 years old. I was waiting for text messaging.
1986: The disposable camera was invented. This is the single most invention that my mother celebrated. She bought so many disposable cameras over the years that she is 5 years behind in getting them developed. Just the other day she said "I developed the camera from Emma's birth!" Uhm mom... Emma is 5. This Christmas we bought my parents a digital camera so I may never see those pictures from when Mary was Baptised.
1988: Prozac was invented. Enough said.
1990: The Wide World Web was invented, and Internet porn has never been happier.
1998: Viagra was invented... which is in correlation to the above invention. It was also invented for Larry King, Michael Douglas, Hugh Hefner and Donald Trump.
2001: The iPod was invented. FINALLY! Something I can USE!
2003: The Hybrid car was invented... but you have to be preppy and rich to own it.
2005: You Tube was invented... really? it's only been 4 years? Hmmmm... I think we need to get out more.
2006: Gorilla tape was invented... this tape is 145% stronger than duct tape. My father has never been happier.
Now, these inventions are all fine and dandy, but will someone please tell my WHY no one has invented a juice box that does not squirt everywhere when the child picks it up. I mean, seriously... many a outfit has been ruined because no matter how much I warn my child to "hold it gently... DON'T SQUEEZE IT!" within seconds there will be juice spraying out the straw and onto the car seat, their outfit, in their hair and in some cases, across the room.
Yes, I am aware that there are little boxes that you can put the juice box in so that they cannot squeeze, but my baby discovered how to open door knobs at the ripe age of 17 months, so do you really think a box to put the juice box into will stop her? No.
Someone, ANYONE, please invent a juice box that doesn't squeeze and spray. That is all I ask. I would do it myself, but I have laundry to do before the juice sets in and makes a stain.
I can't think of everything you know.
1905: The windshield Wiper was invented. That is a good one because we have all had a car at one time that did not have working wipers and when it would rain we made our friends hang out the passenger side and manually wipe the windshields with a napkin from Chick-Fil-A.
1908: Cellophane was invented... causing all mothers and grandmothers to jump for joy and wrap everything in sight including their hair after they put color in it, put rollers in it and I have personally seen my grandmother wrap her new hairdo in cellophane when she couldn't find her shower cap before her bath.
1909: Instant coffee was invented... which could have brought about world peace if it was marketed correctly.
1919: The pop-up toaster was invented... now if they could just figure out a way to clean the toaster without getting crumbs all over the counter, kitchen floor, sink, your clothes, the baby and the dog... then I will be impressed.
1928: Bubble Gum was invented... my children would like to shake that man's hand, and just about every mother in the world would like to beat him to a bloody pulp when said child goes to bed with their gum and wakes up (the day of school pictures no less) with it all through their lovely hair.
1935: Canned Beer was invented... I bet this guy was Irish, and I bet he was somehow related to me.
1943: The slinky and silly putty was invented... my mother never let us play with silly putty, or play dough for that matter. We were only allowed to do chores for fun while my mother napped on the couch and called for more wine. God I love that woman.
1946: The microwave oven was invented... and that was the first Thanksgiving where everyone had their Turkey done in 25 minutes flat. It was a little tough... but it made life easier right?
1948: The frisbee and velcro were invented. I could care less about the frisbee (although dogs everywhere are thankful) but the velcro! Oh God Bless the velcro! None of my children know how to actually tie their shoes, but they can get them on and get in the van in no time flat without bothering me. Genius!
1949: Cake Mix was invented... coming from a non-baker, I think this is great. My grandmother thought a cake mix cake was a sign of stupidity.
1972: I was invented (rather, I was invented in 1971, but born in 1972) and the video game Pong. Greatest year to date I think.
1974: Post-it notes were invented... and husband's everywhere would like to beat the crap out of the guy who helped their wife leave little notes that say "take out the trash", "fix the door knob", "put the toilet seat down" and even "we are out of beer."
1979: Cell phones, the walkman and rollerblades were invented. All things that I love, all things that I used-well, I didn't use a cell phone back then, I was only 7 years old. I was waiting for text messaging.
1986: The disposable camera was invented. This is the single most invention that my mother celebrated. She bought so many disposable cameras over the years that she is 5 years behind in getting them developed. Just the other day she said "I developed the camera from Emma's birth!" Uhm mom... Emma is 5. This Christmas we bought my parents a digital camera so I may never see those pictures from when Mary was Baptised.
1988: Prozac was invented. Enough said.
1990: The Wide World Web was invented, and Internet porn has never been happier.
1998: Viagra was invented... which is in correlation to the above invention. It was also invented for Larry King, Michael Douglas, Hugh Hefner and Donald Trump.
2001: The iPod was invented. FINALLY! Something I can USE!
2003: The Hybrid car was invented... but you have to be preppy and rich to own it.
2005: You Tube was invented... really? it's only been 4 years? Hmmmm... I think we need to get out more.
2006: Gorilla tape was invented... this tape is 145% stronger than duct tape. My father has never been happier.
Now, these inventions are all fine and dandy, but will someone please tell my WHY no one has invented a juice box that does not squirt everywhere when the child picks it up. I mean, seriously... many a outfit has been ruined because no matter how much I warn my child to "hold it gently... DON'T SQUEEZE IT!" within seconds there will be juice spraying out the straw and onto the car seat, their outfit, in their hair and in some cases, across the room.
Yes, I am aware that there are little boxes that you can put the juice box in so that they cannot squeeze, but my baby discovered how to open door knobs at the ripe age of 17 months, so do you really think a box to put the juice box into will stop her? No.
Someone, ANYONE, please invent a juice box that doesn't squeeze and spray. That is all I ask. I would do it myself, but I have laundry to do before the juice sets in and makes a stain.
I can't think of everything you know.
2.09.2009
Just Because It's Monday...
Just because I realize that not all country music is crap...
Just because it is 55 degrees out today, but also raining (what is up with THAT!)
Just because David Blaine is weird... (random I know, but sometimes we need a little humor with our Monday morning)
Just because I am tired of the men complaining about the swoon worthy men who are featured on the Six-Pack... (What? Did you think I would put anything BUT women of substance on here?)
Enjoy your Monday!
p.s. Thanks Beth for opening my eyes to curly hair and cowboys boots. You are so wise.
p.s.s. The "magic" is for you Cousin Steve... just because I know you like magic.
Just because it is 55 degrees out today, but also raining (what is up with THAT!)
Just because I drive my children around so much that my butt is starting to morph into my car seat...
Just because David Blaine is weird... (random I know, but sometimes we need a little humor with our Monday morning)
Just because I am tired of the men complaining about the swoon worthy men who are featured on the Six-Pack... (What? Did you think I would put anything BUT women of substance on here?)
Enjoy your Monday!
p.s. Thanks Beth for opening my eyes to curly hair and cowboys boots. You are so wise.
p.s.s. The "magic" is for you Cousin Steve... just because I know you like magic.
2.06.2009
The Weekend Is Only 48 Hours... Use It Wisely
This weekend I would love to go see...
Or even...
But not before I am done...
But then I will realize...
And I'll end up doing this...
But hopefully I will stay out of trouble and not meet these guys...
(well OF COURSE I won't meet these guys, they are RUSSIAN!)
What are you going to do this weekend?
Or even...
But I probably won't be so lucky because I have to...
And then I need to finish...
But not before I am done...
But then I will realize...
And I'll end up doing this...
But hopefully I will stay out of trouble and not meet these guys...
(well OF COURSE I won't meet these guys, they are RUSSIAN!)
But I would like to meet these guys...
(just because they really make me laugh)
(just because they really make me laugh)
What are you going to do this weekend?
2.05.2009
You Are Great...
Ever have one of those days when you just feel off?
I woke up this morning with a cloud hovering over my head. I am not sure why... probably because last week was the one good week of the month that God gives a woman and I am just on the letdown from that. It is kind of like when you get dressed up and go out with your husband and you have a few glasses of wine with dinner and you are feeling fun and flirty and everything is happy and sparkly... and then you wake up the next morning with a big ol' headache and you are wondering why you are still grasping the wine glass from the restaurant. In these situations, I usually just get up and walk into the kitchen to wash the wine glass, add it to my collection of priceless stolen restaurant glasses,and get on with the day.
But today I couldn't seem to shake it. I miss my husband. I miss normal. Loneliness is a painful thing to endure and if any of you out there are lonely-I understand. I empathize with what you are feeling.
So this little video is for you-because after I watched it, I smiled.
I know it is a little long, but what else were you going to do in the next 15 minutes? Make dinner? Go to the bathroom? Check your email for the tenth time in thirty minutes? Play solitaire? Read the next blog on your list of "things to-do?" Solve the economic crisis? End world hunger? Write a book? Win an award? Discover a new single-celled species?
I found it over at Suzywoozy's Blog, who by the way is amazing in her own right. She is a missionary teaching in India:
It's time for the big adventure- leaving the security of my comfortable well-paying job, rejecting the normalcy of a teaching job and the nobility of working with an NGO... and going into the unknown mostly unaccepted world of doing God's work. I don't know how exactly God will use me, but I feel the irresistible call to mission work. Teaching is good, teaching poor kids is better, but I choose the best- bringing God's love to anyone who wants it. I know it won't be easy, for so many reasons, but that isn't the point. I KNOW that life at the centre of God's will isn't the same place as my comfort zone. I just pray that the same Jesus who calls me will give me the grace I need to live my calling.
She wrote that a year ago on her blog (One of Five) and I have kept up with her posts and all I can say about her is that she is an inspiration!
Today she was able to send her love through the Internet and smack dab into my heart-onto my face-where I was able to smile my way out of my loneliness.
So enjoy my friends-I hope this brings you joy in knowing that through God's love-you are validated!
I woke up this morning with a cloud hovering over my head. I am not sure why... probably because last week was the one good week of the month that God gives a woman and I am just on the letdown from that. It is kind of like when you get dressed up and go out with your husband and you have a few glasses of wine with dinner and you are feeling fun and flirty and everything is happy and sparkly... and then you wake up the next morning with a big ol' headache and you are wondering why you are still grasping the wine glass from the restaurant. In these situations, I usually just get up and walk into the kitchen to wash the wine glass, add it to my collection of priceless stolen restaurant glasses,and get on with the day.
But today I couldn't seem to shake it. I miss my husband. I miss normal. Loneliness is a painful thing to endure and if any of you out there are lonely-I understand. I empathize with what you are feeling.
So this little video is for you-because after I watched it, I smiled.
I know it is a little long, but what else were you going to do in the next 15 minutes? Make dinner? Go to the bathroom? Check your email for the tenth time in thirty minutes? Play solitaire? Read the next blog on your list of "things to-do?" Solve the economic crisis? End world hunger? Write a book? Win an award? Discover a new single-celled species?
I found it over at Suzywoozy's Blog, who by the way is amazing in her own right. She is a missionary teaching in India:
It's time for the big adventure- leaving the security of my comfortable well-paying job, rejecting the normalcy of a teaching job and the nobility of working with an NGO... and going into the unknown mostly unaccepted world of doing God's work. I don't know how exactly God will use me, but I feel the irresistible call to mission work. Teaching is good, teaching poor kids is better, but I choose the best- bringing God's love to anyone who wants it. I know it won't be easy, for so many reasons, but that isn't the point. I KNOW that life at the centre of God's will isn't the same place as my comfort zone. I just pray that the same Jesus who calls me will give me the grace I need to live my calling.
She wrote that a year ago on her blog (One of Five) and I have kept up with her posts and all I can say about her is that she is an inspiration!
Today she was able to send her love through the Internet and smack dab into my heart-onto my face-where I was able to smile my way out of my loneliness.
So enjoy my friends-I hope this brings you joy in knowing that through God's love-you are validated!
2.04.2009
Curses! Foiled Again...
Yesterday I was thinking of Valentine's Day. I hate Valentine's Day because it never turns out the way I want it to, and I completely understand that movie My Bloody Valentine.
Anyway, I was thinking of the post I wanted to do and it had Ward Cleaver showcased as the "Swoon-worthy Regular Joe."
I thought up great interview questions... some that I would post here and some that Blogger would probably cause me to have that "Content on this blog is highly offensive, if you are good with things highly offensive then click Okay, you weirdo." warning before the page appears.
I sent him an email that said:
I think it would be fun to do a post with you as the star. Just answer these questions for me okay?
DO THIS! Don't just delete this email. Pay attention to me and DO THIS!!
I love you.
In this email I had all kinds of great questions like:
"What is your favorite thing about me?"
"What is your favorite thing about being a man?"
"Do you admit that you have horrible handwriting?"
"Are you sorry you yelled at me when we were new and young and starting out and I thought we had $946 in our account and not $746 because of your bad handwriting?"
"Why do you throw away important documents like phone numbers and notes scribbled on little pieces of torn paper that I need to keep track of?"
That kind of stuff... nothing painful.
He emailed me back this:
Is this one of those "Do I look fat in these pants" sort of things you ask me?
Not a chance. I am not touching this.
Love ya.
To which I responded:
C'mon! It will be fun, and I promise not to get angry with anything you have to say.
To which he responded:
I don't know who you are or what you are trying to do here... but please let my wife know I can't do this... for security reasons. My OWN security.
And now every time I email him I get an email back that says that my message is "suspected spam."
Who ever told him he could ignore me? I mean, you put a little thing like, AN ENTIRE WORLD between him and I and he thinks he can be all "I'm a MAN! You can't make me do anything I don't want to do!"
I can't even make him watch American Idol with me as punishment!
He may have won this round... but I can guarantee you I will win the war. {cackling sinisterly and shaking my fist in the air for affect}
Anyway, I was thinking of the post I wanted to do and it had Ward Cleaver showcased as the "Swoon-worthy Regular Joe."
I thought up great interview questions... some that I would post here and some that Blogger would probably cause me to have that "Content on this blog is highly offensive, if you are good with things highly offensive then click Okay, you weirdo." warning before the page appears.
I sent him an email that said:
I think it would be fun to do a post with you as the star. Just answer these questions for me okay?
DO THIS! Don't just delete this email. Pay attention to me and DO THIS!!
I love you.
In this email I had all kinds of great questions like:
"What is your favorite thing about me?"
"What is your favorite thing about being a man?"
"Do you admit that you have horrible handwriting?"
"Are you sorry you yelled at me when we were new and young and starting out and I thought we had $946 in our account and not $746 because of your bad handwriting?"
"Why do you throw away important documents like phone numbers and notes scribbled on little pieces of torn paper that I need to keep track of?"
That kind of stuff... nothing painful.
He emailed me back this:
Is this one of those "Do I look fat in these pants" sort of things you ask me?
Not a chance. I am not touching this.
Love ya.
To which I responded:
C'mon! It will be fun, and I promise not to get angry with anything you have to say.
To which he responded:
I don't know who you are or what you are trying to do here... but please let my wife know I can't do this... for security reasons. My OWN security.
And now every time I email him I get an email back that says that my message is "suspected spam."
Who ever told him he could ignore me? I mean, you put a little thing like, AN ENTIRE WORLD between him and I and he thinks he can be all "I'm a MAN! You can't make me do anything I don't want to do!"
I can't even make him watch American Idol with me as punishment!
He may have won this round... but I can guarantee you I will win the war. {cackling sinisterly and shaking my fist in the air for affect}
2.03.2009
They Don't Call It Fantasy Football For Nothin'
I never understood football... until I met my husband and he was a die hard Bears fan and he explained the entire game to me, over and over and over again. Now I understand it, which is helpful when you have an 11 year old son who only knows how to have conversations in football language... and baseball language (did someone say spring training!!!)
But I will admit that I have never understood Fantasy football, and I still don't, or at least I don't understand it from a man's point of view... but I now understand it from a woman's point of view.
They don't call it a fantasy for nothing.
Mercy.
Thanks Floyd R. Turbo
But I will admit that I have never understood Fantasy football, and I still don't, or at least I don't understand it from a man's point of view... but I now understand it from a woman's point of view.
They don't call it a fantasy for nothing.
Mercy.
Thanks Floyd R. Turbo
2.02.2009
Just Because It's Monday...
Just because it it Monday...
Just because there was a football game yesterday and the Bears were not playing...
Just because I have laundry to do...
Just because my children systematically can produce mayhem and chaos in a clean house in 3 seconds flat...
Just because I have been changing some little person's diaper for 14 years now...
Just because once I am no longer changing little people's diapers I may be changing old people's diapers...
Just because I have no groceries and the co-misery is closed on Mondays...
Just because I have stretch marks...
and saggy boobs...
Just because I needed to smile today...
.
There... doesn't that make you feel better? I know I feel better. Mondays aren't so bad after all.
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