11.10.2008

The Princess And The Pea...

I try very hard to be a good mom. Some days I succeed... some days I fail miserably. Today is a toss up.

I made Emma and Mary a very healthy and nutritious lunch. They had cheese, fruit and some veggies. Mary loves peas so she had a mountain of peas on her height chair. Feeling happy that they were occupied with their food, I headed to the bathroom to finish brushing my teeth... I was only able to brush my bottom teeth this morning so I was taking the brief moment of freedom to brush the tops. I thought I may even have enough time to floss! Oh the excitement!

Two minutes later I hear Emma yelling for me. I run into the kitchen to find that Mary has stuffed a pea up her nose.

No problemo-I have been here before. Hope used to love to stuff things up her nose... marbles, barbie shoes, tissue paper balls. I was an expert nose picker outer. All of those years of my mother yelling at me for picking my nose did not lessen my ability to search and hunt the nasal cavity.

The pea was close enough to the opening that I was able to just pull in out with my finger nail as if it were a stray booger. Feeling confident in my abilities, I looked up her nose to see if I got all the pea and saw another one. I didn't want to squeeze her little nose together because it would have been harder to pull out pea soup rather than a pea ball. Miraculously, I was able to fish out that pea as well. Again, thinking that disaster was averted, I looked up her little nose once more to see another pea! Good Lord! This one was harder because it was wayyy up there. I tried to get her to blow her nose-which was kind of like trying to teach a man to put the toilet seat down-impossible.

I knew I would have to do the bondage move. I ran for my trusty tweezers and pulled her out of her chair. I had Aaron hold her down while I went pea fishing.

10 stressful seconds later the pea was extracted. This had to be the last pea right? Nope...

Mary stood up and coughed. A tiny pea dropped right out of her nose... and then she laughed and clapped.

So that was 4.. count em, 4 peas in a little 18 months old's nose. I knew the moment that I laid eyes on my husband and saw his nostrils that it would one day come back to haunt me. So technically this is yet one more thing I can blame on my mother in law.

My mother of the year award is once again safe. Phew.

19 comments:

Aubrey said...

Thank you for the laughs! I'm impressed with your talent for nasal cavity spelunking!

Delilah said...

When I was about her age I stuffed 4 raisins up each nose hole!! Don't worry about the mother of the year award: My mother was sitting right next to me when it happened!!

Chelle said...

That was too funny! I think you should get mother of the year for being able to get them all out!

But now I'm not looking forward to Isabella figuring out that more than her finger can fit in that little nose of hers...

Sagey said...

I am impressed you were able to fish them all out yourself. Our youngest stuck a raisin up his nose once and I could NOT get it out. We went to the ER. So here is the trick if your child has stuffed a SMOOTH object up their nose (I was instructed that this technique does not work for Barbi Shoes)....

Put a drop of saline in the affected nostril then close the other side of the child's nose and blow strongly into your child's mouth as if you were doing mouth to mouth... you will soon have a flying object! I think the raisin hit Blunoz right in the face!

Hope said...

I never had nasal expeditions to contend with I mainly dealt with the eating of said boogers and I'm totally blaming that on the other side of the family.

Pedge said...

That is hil-lar-i-ous. You and yours never fail to crack me up!Mom of the year for sure.

Betty Beguiles said...

You crack me up!

Stupid Fat Hobbit said...

Pea-yew!

So she pea-ked at 4?

Sounds like you had a hap-pea day.

Maybe you should read her the pea-attitudes.

Doesn't sound very a-pea-lling.

Might need to look this up in the encyclo-pea-dia.

Guess you should be happy she wasn't eating pea-ches.

Or pea-nuts.

Pea-ce out!

Mary Ellen Barrett said...

Oh,my. Why do they do this? At least your sense of humor is intact, your account is hilarious. I had a similar experience with a kid old enough to know better.

http://maryellenb.typepad.com/tales_from_the_bonny_blue/2007/07/fodder-for-the-.html

blunoz said...

My wife already wrote about our experience with the raisin up the nose. I just wish I had known that "blow in the mouth and it comes out the nose" trick before we spent 15 minutes driving to the emergency room and another 30 minutes waiting for the doctor. When the doctor finally came to us, he just said, "Alright Dad, I'm gonna pinch his other nostril shut and you're gonna blow in his mouth." Sure enough, that raisin SHOT out of his nose, ricocheted off my cheek, bounced off the ceiling, and landed on the other side of the Emergency Room. After all that time waiting, we were with the doctor all of like 30 seconds.

SabrinaT said...

MY gosh 4! My oldest did get 2 way up there when he was about 3. He thought it was fun!

CJ said...

I was looking through a magazine after reading your "pea extraction" story and I saw this book...Little Pea, by Amy Krouse.

Soliloquy said...

Pea fishing?

That is just classic. Totally worthy of documentation.

TexasMomof3 said...

We had an emergency room visit a couple of weeks ago. Little sister decided to stick a jingle bell in her ear. I guarantee you that at least 5 people asked, "why did she do that?" Are they kidding?! Several hundred dollars later, bell out, we're back home, and hopefully no repeats of putting small objects in random places...

momto5minnies said...

You are talented ;) That story will live forever.

My 2nd did a dried Kraft Macaroni and Cheese noodle. We hoped it would soften and come out, but no such luck. I needed to drag that child to the doctor for an extraction.

Anonymous said...

Stupid Fat Hobbit
had fun with that one, eh?

~ Straight Shooter ~ said...

Stinkin' Hilarious!
You win hands down - MOTHER OF THE YEAR for sure!!
I am so impressed!

Carrie Hasson said...

your husband is one lucky guy to be married to your sense of humor for the rest of his life...definitely one lucky guy!

TheFiveDays said...

Oh MY! FOUR of 'em!!