12.31.2007

One Man For Sale...

Well, OK... he is not FOR SALE, but he is up for auction.


The other day I received a letter (handwritten) from my cousin Keith. Keith is the offspring of the Clan AuntBarbUncleDon. As I was reading his letter I thought "Why isn't this guy married?" And then it hit me... I should plaster his picture on this here blog and see if there are any ladies out there who would be good enough for him. Oprah does this kind of stuff all of the time, and I am just like Oprah.

Many a childhood memory involved my cousin Keith. He is younger than me (I think he is in his early 30's right now) and he always got a spankin' at every single family get together. It became tradition. It was not Christmas until Keith got the belt. Now, do not let that sway your opinion of Keith, he was never a bad boy... he was just a boy. Women don't want men who were sissies when they were younger, women want men who were boys when they were kids-boys who pulled the butts off of a lightening bugs and who threw rocks at the neighbor to defend you (that was actually Keith's brother Dave that threw the rock at their neighbor to defend me... and it was after the neighbor threw a rock at me and hit me square in the forehead, but they are from the same gene pool so all is good.)


Keith is also a self made millionaire... or at least he is on his way to becoming one. I know this because he looks so debonair and cool when I see him. He has a smile that can melt your heart-but only if you like dimples. If you don't like dimples then he is not the man for you, you dimple hating person.


He was a tremendous athlete growing up, and still is today. He lives in Hilton Head South Carolina (if that does not sell ya, I don't know what I can do for you.) He is a riot to be around and he truly loves his family. You will be guaranteed a good time... especially if he brings you to one of our family weddings. Just don't let him sit with cousin Steve from the Clan AuntRoseUncleChuck or with cousin Johnny from the Clan AuntJudiUncleHarold... that is all I am gong to say about that.



Have I mentioned that he loves kids? Say it with me ladies "Winner!" He has actually told me on more than one occasion that he can't wait to have kids-a lot of them. He wants to find a nice girl, get married and have babies. If that doesn't make your uterus ache I don't know what will. *The above photo is of Keith with is nephew Evan... too stinkin' cute!


And last but certainly not least... Keith is Irish. If that does not seal that deal I don't know what will!


So if you are interested send me an email. If you are not interested because you are married, old, male, or blind... forward this post on to all of the young ladies you know out there who are looking for a good man. Better yet, forward this post on to the mothers of the young ladies you know who are looking for a good man. Forward this to mothers out there who are tired of their daughters dating men who were sissies and aren't Irish. Let's get this boy married off shall we?

19 comments:

Anna B. said...

You and PDUB should host a blog for her brother DW and your cousin Keith, I bet they would get more hits than eharmony and maybe lead into a reality show... I'm just sayin.. ;-)

http://thepioneerwoman.com/page/4

Anna B.

Sister Mary Martha said...

Just dropped by to say Happy New Year!

june cleaver said...

Oh Good Sister... I am glad you said you were just stopping by to say Happy New Year and you weren't checking out my cousin. :)

Have a great one Sister!

june cleaver said...

Oh and Sister... my Aunt Barb (mother of Keith) will be so thrilled to see you commented on the post with her boy. It'll make her day~

Anonymous said...

filing this away for future reference...Happy New Year!

Kasia said...

He's very handsome! If I weren't already completely in love with my Canuck, I would gladly bid. ;-)

But before I try to interest one of my single Catholic friends...you know what I have to ask...how is such a great guy not already taken?!?

momto5minnies said...

I am partial to dimples, but I snagged a good man already. He even cooked a great pot of chili with cornbread for me.

I do hope that he finds the "right one".

Anonymous said...

Gostei muito desse post e seu blog é muito interessante, vou passar por aqui sempre =) Depois dá uma passada lá no meu site, que é sobre o CresceNet, espero que goste. O endereço dele é http://www.provedorcrescenet.com . Um abraço.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Thanks for the kind words cuz. In an attempt to keep the information as accurate as possible, I'd like to say that I am 30. Not "early 30's", but just 30. :)

Happy New Year,

Keith

Welcome to Great Goblets! said...

Wow! What a cutie-pie! I too am Irish, yet, I, alas, am married. And, I've got a good one too .... Although, my French-Indian, German one doesn't get any of my Irish tendencies! Blast him! HE!! Happy New Year! Good luck with the hunt for Keith's spouse. I'm sure he'll have them lining up!!
~Heather

june cleaver said...

Kasia, he isn't married yet because we are a special family... not just anyone can get a ticket to ride!

Anonymous said...

First off Happy New Year...secondly if it was not for the fact that I am already married I would bid!
I hope you can help him find the right one!

Maura said...

Cris, I love your blog. You are one of the funniest people I know. I live in Washington, DC and want to be your friend, but feel like a tool saying that! I write with my dear friend, Allison, in mind for Keith. Though she lives in Arlington, VA. She is a great catch! But long distance romance is not the easiest.

june cleaver said...

mbbutler... I am alsays looking for friends, but I warn you, I am rather boring in person.

As for Allison-send her stats, love has no distance! Oh... is she Irish? How bout Catholic?

Anonymous said...

I just had to stop by and let you know that my sister sent me this blog. I guess she is still looking out for me! Yes, she's trying to get me married as well! I just don't know how you feel about dutch girls.. :) Oh, and the dimples..need I say more ;)

june cleaver said...

anonymous... how am I supposed to set you up with Keith when you are anonymous? Talk about hard to get!

Anonymous said...

Well, anonymous no longer my name is Maria, and I wasn't sure how you would feel if I wasn't Irish ;) I am Catholic and come from a large family, 10 in all. I live in Michigan too, but I would love to visit South Carolina! I am always up for a vacation somewhere warm!!

Anonymous said...

Ladies, this man is definitely a catch! He is family orientated, personable, confident, driven, obviously handsome and my little brother! I have no doubt that he will be married when the time is right. Good things come with time!
Big Sister Beth

P.S. Materialistic women need not apply. Yes, I have the right to be somewhat protective!