I have figured out my list of demands:
- Oprah needs to call me. I have mentioned her name several times on this blog and she has yet to compensate me.
- Britney Spears owes me money too... but that was for a dance I did on MTV with her.
- Bill Gates owes me a few posts due to Microsoft errors that have caused perfectly good and brilliant moments of clarity to be lost forever.
That is all... I will see you rot in hell before I bow down to the demands of the blog world.
Oh who am I kidding... I will be back tomorrow. I have too much to do today (laundry, dishes, dusting, toilet scrubbing.)
You know what, scratch everything I said. I just want someone to teach my children how to put their shoes in the closet instead of in front of the door so that I trip and fall each and every mother loving time I walk in this house. I will write forever if you can give me that.
See you at the negotiations table my friend.
3 comments:
Cris,
You may drive a hard bargain, but you will have my vote! That reminds me, tomorrow is election day in NWI. So any of you NWI folks out there don't forget to go to the polls.
Love,
Aunt Barbara
Your going to just die on the day Oprah does call, your blog is too funny and so right on the mark not to be noticed by her people!
I was googling to find a picture of from an old Oprah show of a 9mo pregnant woman with six-pack ABS and your blog was the first thing that popped up. The random thing is, that I visit daniellebean and have visited this blog before...small world!
Post a Comment