Open Letter To VH1

Dear VH1,


Why do you do this to me? Why do you put reality shows on like Rock Of Love or Scott Baio is 45 and Single? This does no one any good-especially me because I now have to spend hours in front of the television waiting to see who Brett Michaels will choose to stay and rock his world and why oh why poor Chachi Arcola has a hard time committing. It is unfair to my family-it is unfair to the world!


Now you go and put on a show called the Pick Up Artist where a man (who I must say is just about the ugliest man around who wears eyeliner) teaches a gaggle of nerdy men his tricks of the trade for picking up women in bars. Oh the humanity!


You must have been reading my mind at the beginning of the summer VH1 when I thought "Boy, I wish there was some really bad TV shows about my former heartthrobs that I can watch." It was like you took the posters from my teenage bedroom and ran with them... well played VH1... well played.

Watching these shows makes me think of my high school prom date. He was the football quarterback and the captain of the soccer team. He was popular and had a license. Imagine my surprise when I saw him 15 years after high school and he was bald with a beer belly. My heart was broken.


Your shows have broken my heart VH1. Chachi used to be up there on a star pedestal for me... and now he is a 45 year old single man who hangs out with loser friends. Brett Michaels used to be the ultimate rock star for me... now he is in his 40's and choosing women who look like they have spent time in prison to "rock his world."

You have done a cruel cruel thing here VH1 and I do not appreciate it. Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,


June Cleaver



P.S. Maybe next summer you could run a show where Corey Haim and Cory Feldman live together and drive each other crazy... oh wait, A&E has already beaten you to the punch. Thank goodness "The Two Corey's" comes on after Brett Michaels. Phew.