The other purchase I made was those stupid "Slim in 6" DVDs that would have worked it I liked sweating, but if you have read me long enough you will know that I abhor sweating and anything that makes me sweat, so needless to say, those DVDs were a waste of time.
Well, today as I was flipping through the channels, I was compelled to stop and stare wide eye'd at the television. Ken Paves was on and he was showing us how he uses hair extensions on Jessica Simpson.
I was freakin' enthralled!
Right before Mary Claire was born I went to a new hair stylist and instructed her to cut off all of my long hair. I thought I needed a new look, when all I really needed was to give birth. I have regretted that day for over 8 months now and am growing back my blond ambition. It sucks and most days I wake up, look in the mirror and gag.
Ken Paves is the answer to my prayers. Yes readers... I bought me some hair extensions today! Next week I may buy me some elastic pants...
I am no stranger to fake hair. I bought my first fake ponytail years ago and wore it until I looked like Britney Spears on a bad day. Last year I bought another fake hair piece, only this one you put on to give you a nice up-do. It is versatile, as in I have worn it with jeans and I have worn it to my husband's 20 year class reunion. Coincidentally, I was with my sister-in-law for both fake hair purchases. We have also bought jewelry from strange men on the beach and made prank phone calls together. We are a perfect pair.
So my new hair should be here in a couple of weeks. I am so excited to go from a hair grower outer to a VaVaVaVooom hair woman.
I may just put on my Daisy Dukes and eat Tuna all day in my new hair. I can't wait to be a dumb blond! My husband will be thrilled!
Tuna? That's chicken, right?
ReplyDeleteI am just glad that men are beyond worrying about our hair styles, or lack thereof, and that it is not a mutli-gazillion dollar industry.
ReplyDeleteNow where did I leave my hair in a can spray?
Sex-y! You must, MUST post pictures, Cris.
ReplyDeleteI have an entire DRAWER full of faux hair. In three different shades - frosted (from back when I was taking out loans to get my hair professionally "woven"); auburn (because I'd always wanted to be a redhead and I bought some Clairol and ruined my hair for almost TWO years - it grows sloooooowly); and my natural ditch-water brown. I love me my fake hair, and can't bear to throw any of them away because, well, you never know! And Cris, thanks a million for the shout-out - that dog IS pretty stinkin' cute, isn't she? Pop eyes, satellite-dish ears and rat paws - who knew these attributes could make such a winning combination?
ReplyDeleteOK, I was going to post that I had a drawer-full, too, but now that you 'fessed up, I can come clean: three drawer fulls. They just look too good not to get addicted to them. Better than lipstick. Better than Botox. (Almost; let's not get crazy here...)
ReplyDeleteSo it was only a matter of time before I went for the permanant ones and voila! I had mermaid hair that any 6 year old would envy. It was fabulous while it lasted but the thing they don't tell you is that, if you have a head-full of extensions, they go all Rasta on you. And then they break off. So after I paid yet another fortune to get them removed, it was back to the comb/snap-in kind. Safer that way; trust me. You will love them.
~St. Fashionista
Oh Boy! I saw that same show on the guide as I was flipping through channels lastnight, and had to talk myself out of actually turning it to that channel. I knew I'd be sucked in if I turned it over to watch! Although, why I'm not sure - I already have long hair...I can convince myself I need about everything they have on HSN - although I've yet to buy anything. I do however have my eye on yet another piece of exercise equipment. It looks way more fun than any I already own! Too bad you have to actually use them to lose the weight! It should come off just by owning it!
ReplyDeleteHah! I don't have any comments for your faux hair, i keep very little of any on my head. But this morning i was headed for my 6th cup of coffee and uttered to myself, "I want to be June Cleaver." So i did a blingo search with that very "utterance" (is that a word?)and found your blog. I scanned through it, you are very funny. I wished we were interested in living in D.C., I'd buy your house. LOL Thanks for the giggles, I needed them.
ReplyDeleteCris,
ReplyDeleteI just found the best snack. Today at my weigh in they gave away ww peanut butter bliss snacks!!!! The name says it all. I weigh in in the morning and one of the other gals in the office goes over lunch -- I had her pick up a box for me and I am not a huge fan of ww stuff.
Seriously, 1 point. I am not sure if you can get them in the store or not.
Yeah, I got one of those peanut better bliss snacks at my weigh in. She gave it to me and I put it in my purse...then she told us it was only 1 point I whipped it out and three bites later I was in peanut butter heaven...and no guilt. And chewy too!
ReplyDeleteLove,
Aunt Barbara
I have not donned any "fake" hair, but have done the little gel falsies in the bra.
ReplyDeleteWhatever makes YOU feel good ;)
I'm glad you enjoy this whole hair thing. I thin k hairduts are evel. I hate spending money on them, and I dread when it's time. Speaking of,,, it's been ime for about a week - for me to 'get my ears lowered" - anothe rwonderful expression/reminder of how much a hair cut sucks. I wish I was bald - really
ReplyDeleteYou will have to post pictures.
ReplyDeleteI'm fascinated to see the results.
No, it's chicken. Not tuna.
ReplyDeleteI have had a hair disaster this week. I look like a tired mom that tired to go punk. My blonde bombshell didn't turn out so hot with the sister doing a home job. Off to the professional tomorrow.
ReplyDelete